Mated With Five Boys

"Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers, but to be fearless in facing them.Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain, but for the heart to conquer it"- Rabindranath Tagore 

"What are you doing here?"

I quickly looked over, my panic fading.

"Making sure you stay out of trouble? Axel smirked over at me, the light from the flames bouncing off his face.

"I don't need a babysitter.’ I huffed out, looking away from him and at the fire.

"That's debatable."

He grunted.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

I asked, slightly offended.

"This place is crawling with Noah's men” He said lowly, his eyes focusing on the ground.

"You were worried about me."

I teased, looking over at him.

"Don't go getting a big head, it's not like we are friends or anything.'' He chuckled which caused his laugh lines to show.

"Right because you haven't spilled your guts yet"

I reminded him, Axel just rolled his eyes in response.

"Well, what do we have here?"

Axel's voice was laced with amusement.

My eyes followed to where Axel was looking and that's when I saw Kina and Rylan irrupting from the darkness the woods, holding hands.

Well that dirty scoundrel, no wonder I couldn't find him! I instantly jumped up to my feet at the sight of Rylan, I need his help with Camila.

If things were different I'd probably be more happy for him and Kina, but this was life or death.

"Woah, Woah, Woah."

Axel jumped up.

"Where are you going?"

He asked standing in front of me, blocking my path.

"Move, I need to talk to Rylan; I stated, trying to step around him but he just moved with me causing me to let out an irritated breath.

"You got me instead."

Axel huffed, his eyes turning into slits.

"I can't tell you! You've got to move, the longer I wait the worse it's going to get."

I wanted to smack his chest but I didn't.

"What are you talking about?"

His eyes searched my face looking for answers.

"Move!"

I hissed, stomping my foot on the dirt.

"Come with me first."

He stated, his eyes holding a mysterious glint.

"I can't"

I couldn't control the whine that escaped my throat.

"Please Mia.’ Axel's eyes bored into mine, his dark irises swirling with different emotions.

I looked over at Rylan and saw him laughing at something Kina had said, her eyes were shining bright with content.

I'll let them have just a few more moments of happiness.

I looked back over at Axel and gave in, I couldn't say no the look on his face.

"Just a few minutes, okay?"

I told him.

He nodded his head in agreement, grabbing my hand and hauling me somewhere into the darkness of the woods.

My hand tingled something that happened often when Axel touched me.

I followed Axel blindly into the tall trees, slapping branches out from my face from time to time.

I could barely see anything with the treetops blocking out most of the moonlight which caused me to stumble on fallen branches.

I now understand why everyone falls in horror movies, they can't freaking see anything.

"Where are we going?"

I asked him.

"We're almost there"

striding effortlessly in the

the answer I was looking for’ I said

and I run right into his

didn't budge any, he was like

to another clearing, a little higher than

the ledge that

slightly, keeping a good distance

labored and I think Axel

way worse than being

my hand, sending me to the ground where he

"Look up.’ He whispered.

only trained to look

the sky Angel,’ Axel

eyes away from the ledge and forced them to

the sight in front of me, my stomach dropping

had to be at least a million stars shining above me,

never seen so many stars in my

hard to really star gaze with all city lights but here, in the middle of nowhere, it

outside with your mom and look at

muttered, staring

I whispered, lost in the balls

you know, everything.’ He spoke,

wasn't okay.’ I

"But, I forgive you."

over

want you to

I finished.

his hands to look straight passed

"Where do I begin?"

He thought out loud.

I joked,

a look and sighed

birth to me.’ Axel furrowed his eyebrows, looking

and from what people have told me before

church, promising careers, they even had just boughten their first house with a baby boy on the

months into my mom's pregnancy something happens

fuzzy because no one really talked about her

but couldn't save her: I watched his

I whispered, I

make him relive the pain

to drugs and alcohol, he felt like

at me without seeing the product of the devil, but I think it was more of the fact every

came to see me, not once.I only know because my aunt, my mother's sister, was there everyday and she told me when I was older.I lived with my aunt until I was five until she got pregnant herself and couldn't afford taking care of two

wasn't for his girlfriend at the time, she would feed me and even sometimes give me baths when I really

to start school, that's when the beatings began.He would get wasted and come home swinging pretty much every night.He would scream at me saying I killed his wife, that I was a monster, I

so I started fighting back.I would punch, kick, bite, and scratch whatever I could, but he was

eight.I was in and out what felt like hundred houses because I was the "problem kid"that started fights

He shook his head.

I were her first foster kids.I treated her like shit, I tried to break her, make her ship me off to

talking about his past he finally looked up

eyes were watery and my heart

around him, pulling my body close to

there wasn't anything I could say to make him feel better so I just hugged him as hard as

was lucky I could put his broken pieces back together and maybe mine

suffocating

peeling

mumbled, instantly

your

winked causing me to roll my eyes

Stupid Axel.

mom, cancer is unforgiving” Axel spoke

my head agreeing with

skin is, your choice in religion, or

stage 4 leukemia, her body stopped reacting to the medication; I explained, surprisingly not feeling as emotional as I usually

us before I was born;

"That's so fucked"

He said angrily.

make us

looking

He gave me a dirty look but I heard

"You're right, that's absurd."

I played along.

comfortable silence, my eyes wandered back to

Camila flooded my

Camila.’ I rushed out

was the only one

have probably

"And Angelo."

I put in.

"Why?"

gave me a weird

nervous all over again,

"He hit her Axel,"

whispered, my voice

on her yesterday,’ I

you tell me

Axel yelled, standing up.

her with Angelo’s life if anyone