Mated With Five Boys

"I thought about how there are two types of secrets: the kind you want to keep in, and the kind you don't dare to let out"- Ally Carter 

English the next day still in shock after what Camila had told me.

Noah threatened her with Angelo's life, what kind of monster does that? I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, the only person I knew who could handle this situation couldn't be told, not like I would want to talk to him anyway.

I thought about going to Rylan or even Rose but I'm not sure how much good it would do, it would just put them in danger.

Even if we did somehow stop Noah who's to say another one of his guys would start where he left off? But I couldn't sit around and let Camila be punching bag either.

I remember her saying that Noah wasn't going to stop sending people after me and from what I saw the other night I believed her.

I was terrified to leave my room and I constantly felt like I was being watched.

Axel said I should tell Samantha that I can't take the job, which I considered doing, but then I remember it was Axel who said it and instantly disagreed.

If I get enough money I could buy a plane ticket back to New York, sure I'll be homeless but at least I wouldn't have to worry about gangs or looking over my shoulder everywhere I go.

Mrs.Porter was rambling about some literature assignment that was due next week.

I tried paying attention to her but between everything that was going on in my head and the intense stare that I knew was coming from Axel, I couldn't really concentrate.

I knew that the unwavering stare was coming for him because for the past day that's all he has been doing.

It's quite creepy really.

I could tell he has been stepping on eggshells around me ever since he read my journal.

He probably didn't know if I was going to scream at him or break down in tears.

The truth is I could yell at Axel until I was red in the face but it would do no good, the damage is done, I was never one to cry over spilled milk.

Unless it was chocolate.

Now that Axel has read my journal he's acting differently around me now, he asks me if I need rides to school or if I want him to wait in my room until I fall asleep.

Of course, I decline and tell him to leave me alone but that doesn't stop him from acting like I'm fine china or something.

It honestly makes me feel worse, I don't need his or anybody's else pity.

I didn't write those things down for attention or to show off how miserable my life was.

I psychically cringed thinking about the things Axel most had read in that book.

I'll admit some things in that journal are a little over dramatic even though they're all true events but I guess when you're that sad, no inconvenience is a minor inconvenience.

When it's one disaster after another you stop looking at it as a bad day but more as the world is out to get you.

I remember waking up most days feeling so sad that I forgot what it's like not to be and now thinking back on it, isn't that the sad part? From the age of seven, all the way until I was fifteen was when I shrugged the most with my panic attacks, at first it was over normal things people were nervous about like public speaking, meeting new people or even the dark.

But slowly and surely the triggers were over smaller events like people looking at me for a millisecond too long, people raising their voices even if it was direct towards me or even what I was going to have for dinner that night.

I felt like I was fighting for my life every day, my seven year old self didn't know then how to control my breathing or not to focus on the constricting of my rib cage.

I wanted to ask what was happening to me but I learned at young age that just because somethings happen doesn't mean we talk about it.

It might make someone uncomfortable.

I also learned at a young age to not have compassion for anyone that doesn't outrage.

"Mr.Deacon, what are you doing?"

Said Mrs.Porter, bring me out of my thoughts.

I looked over my shoulder towards Axel's desk, curious as to what she was talking about.

That's when I noticed Axel marching straight at me.

My eyes widen when he grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards the classroom door.

"Mr.Deacon you cannot just leave class!"

Mrs.Porter yelled.

Axel stopped walk and turned to face her, his expression was annoyed and unbothered.

"Do you ever shut up?"

He asked, giving her an irritated look.

I gasp slightly and practically pleaded with her to stop him with my eyes but she did nothing but gape at him as he pulled me into the hallway.

"You can't talk to a teacher that way!"

I hissed at him.

"We need to talk."

He ignored my statement which made me roll my eyes.

"Are you ready to tell me what I want to know?"

I asked, raising my eyebrows at him.

"Of course not."

He shook his head.

talk about; I said, turning to

a minute would

huffed, grabbing

"Don't.touch.me."

but Axel didn't

can't hate me forever Angel.’ He

I countered, pulling his hand

are you so goddamn

towards one the guys I recognize seeing the night

as he sent him a slight nod before returning his

I asked him.

was making my head spin and it took all the willpower

"Fine"

through

"Fine, what?"

eyes snapped towards

you whatever you want

"Really?"

I said in shock.

body tingled when Axel pressed his body

sure what he was trying to find

you got to promise me something.’ He whispered slowly, licking his

"What's that?"

trying not look

got to promise

looking down

I said in a dazed state, looking at his lips, which I instantly

tell me about your childhood then we will be even and we can go back to not being

when Axel rested his forehead against mine, I wanted to curse

of course, it had to be Axel Deacon who made my stomach lurch for all the

are you doing

whispered so low that I don't think I was

heart started thumping and my palms were growing sweaty, I had an aching desire to push Axel away from

had no clue what I should say in a situation like

struggle I felt my phone vibrate

and grabbed the phone, I wasn't sure who would

slightly but I could still feel his breath

tried to ignore him and focus on the

but when Axel snatched my phone out of my hands and told me I couldn't go I suddenly had a

can't tell me

I huffed out.

"I said no Mia"

at me, almost daring me to argue with him, so I

I don't care what you say.’ I

him clench his jaw, obviously not

him for always being so serious but I didn't

in the ass,

tried to sound annoyed but I saw

well, you're a pain

I rolled my eyes.

couldn't help the smile that erupted on my

though, you're not

amusement was long gone from his

"Yes, I am."

him a

safe there will be too many people there,

said through

"I'm going, Axel."

narrowed my eyes

time Mia! I have shit I need to

blazing

never asked

lowly, his eyes

to say something but right as

chance to slip away from Axel

to get my

my way out I apologized for Axel's lack of social skills and for causing a

with a small

was grateful not to find Axel waiting for me, that

looked down at my phone and wanted to groan out loud, I told Wyatt that I would go to

Stupid Axel.

BUMP

of his lungs, dancing in

he would reach up and pinch Phoenix cheeks,

TIMES NEVER SEEMED

He continued.

scene in front of me, I think Wyatt was trying to annoy him but it wasn't working, he was enjoying seeing his boyfriend make

BEEN INCLINED! BUMP BUMP

beside me, reaching up and grabbing

THEY NEVER

They sang in unison.

temper tantrum, he

going to ride with Rylan, Kina, and Angelo but Wyatt was having none of that,