Surrogate For Alpha Dom
Chapter 120
Ella
When my panic attack finally eases and I can breathe again, I peek up at Sinclair,
tears burning in my eyes. “I’m sorry.” I murmur weakly, hating that my stupid brain
ruined our moment.
“Why the hell are you apologizing?” Sinclair counterS, still petting me. He hadn’t let
me go even once as I weathered the storm of anxiety and despair, only pulling the
pillows and blankets of my nest closer so I would feel secure.
“Because I screwed everything up.” I explain thickly. “I was supposed to be helping
you and I fell apart at a mere suggestion.” Shame is coursing through my veins, not
because of the panic itself, but because of what it might mean: that I’m too fragile, too
broken, to be Sinclair’s Luna.
“Ella, don’t be silly.” He replies, and though I understand he didn’t mean to dismiss my
feelings, the words still sting. Sinclair opens his mouth to continue, undoubtedly with
some trite placation about how ‘these things happen’ or similar, but I cut him off.
“I’m not being silly!” I insist with exasperation.
What good am I as a mate if I can’t even be there for you when you need me? I get to
lie around all day doing nothing while you’re out saving the world. You are constantly
taking care of me on top of all your other Worries, and I never give you anything in
return. It’s not right. You shouldn’t have to comfort me when you’re the one who needs
to decompress!” I burst, throwing up my hands. “All this time we’ve been convinced
that I can’t be your Luna because I’m human, but we never even considered that I
might not be up to the task, even as a wolf.” My voice is shaking with fresh tears, and I
can’t look at Sinclair as I continue, “But now… what more evidence do we need?”
Sinclair doesn’t make a sound, and when I look at him, he’s positively fuming. His
heavy breathing and black expression tell me he’s barely holding onto his temper, and
the hands which were caressing me mere moments ago are now stationary and stiff. I
watch as he struggles to quell his anger, even though I’m not sure what I said to
infuriate him this way. After a second he shakes his head, apparently surrendering the
battle. “I need a minute, Ella.” He finally growls, “I need to go for a run, but I don’t want
leave you unless
it!” I burst, my voice cracking. I’m out of the bed in
in front of the bed. “This is exactly what I’m
ne from reality. If you’re angry
Consequences
of the nest, stalking forward with white-knuckled
a panic attack, Ella. If
my wolf out and run off this temper.” He turns and
the door, bypassing
he turns back, his wolf
this isn’t special treatment.” He rumbles angrily,
of control this way. If you need
ask the guards.”
and I can hear his wolf racing away down the hall.
simply stand there, staring after him. Im
a fresh bout of weeping. I consider
me of selfishly unloading my problems onto her,
refrain.
my head, whimpering like a pup
I am – if more feral. She’s begging me to do something, to fix this, but
have felt terrible for falling apart
my wolf seems much more distraught
I can’t
Even if I wasn’t on bed rest and it was
áble to catch up with him. Besides, he’ll only be angrier
house.
still beside
a little ball and pulling the blankets over my head. I
though Sinclair has certainly been angry with me in the past.
after some thought. Why weren’t you this
digger, or when he spanked me or dragged me
argues. I was barely awake in the
been protective. This is
hostile .. and the first time he’s walked out. What if he
but there’s a small part of me that
exact same thing.
come back, even if he only returns to end our relationship
all, he lives here. But somewhere deep down inside of
I’ll never see him
what if he decides we’re not worth the
pastures? My wolf presses.
ridiculous! I shout at her. His entire life is
abandon
digs in her paws. It wouldn’t be the
pup, especially with humans –
with us – what if he’s finally figured it out
if this was
it!” I cry aloud, clamping my hands over my ears, even though her
inside my head. “
it, stop it, stop
and the more time that passes,
Update Chapter 120 of Surrogate For Alpha Dom
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