Teacher's Girl (Aflyingwhale)

EMMA’s POV : 

lan was standing at the door.He looked tired, disheveled, and there was this sadness in his eyes.But he was still my lan.

I was so relieved to see him in front of me.The moment I saw him standing there, my heart was doing backflips and I wished I could jump out of this bed and hug him.But I was still too weak, so all I could do was smile at him.  

"Hey, "I said softly.

"Hi,"he moved closer and closed the door behind him.

"How are you feeling—"

"I've missed you," I cut him off quickly.

I missed him so much, I couldn't hold it in anymore.I was so happy to see him, but then I also felt super self- conscious.I had been sitting in this hospital bed for a week.

Sure, I took a shower and all, but I probably looked terrible.I still had scars and bruises all over my face and body from the accident.As if he knew what I was thinking about, that sadness in his eyes was showing again.He put his gaze down as if he was in pain and stalked closer to the bed.

When he reached the side of my bed, he stopped and looked up at me.His eyes were glistening.

"I missed you too,"he paused for a moment and his hand reached for my face.

I leaned my face to the palm of his hand and he squeezed my cheek gently.He then took a deep breath and said, "I’m so sorry.I’m so sorry for everything,"

"No, I’m the one who should apologize..." I shook my head slowly.

My voice cracked when I spoke because I saw how broken he was.

All this time I was thinking about myself and my own feelings, I had forgotten that lan was hurting too.

"Why are you apologizing?"he said softly.

"Because...Because I was selfish and immature.I didn’t handle the situation right.I was confused and I just shut you out...and then I did something very reckless and stupid and I..."I could stop the tears from streaming down my face as I said, "I lost our baby...I'm really sorry,"

I was full on sobbing at this point and lan grabbed me and pulled me into his chest.He held onto me tightly as I cried into his shirt.

"It's not your fault, Emma.It's okay,"

he cooed me and stroked the back of my head.

"It is my fault.It’s all my fault.I messed everything up..."

my voice was muffled because I buried face into his chest.

"No, you don't,"

"Yes, I did,"

"No, look, you’re here and you're okay.That's all that matters,"he said as he tilted my face up.

He stared at me with this look of deep longing, and I thought he was going to kiss me.But instead, he leaned his forehead down and rested it against mine.He breathed me in and I breathed him in, and we just stayed like that for a while.

"I was so scared I was gonna lose you,"he whispered.

"You're never gonna lose me," I said as I gripped the back of his head.

I was leaning my face forward and pulling him in for a kiss, our lips almost touched, but then he pulled away quickly.

"lan?"

"You look really tired.I think I should let you rest for a while,"he said nervously.

"No, I’m fine," I said reassuringly.

"Are you sure?"

feel really weak, but I'm feeling much

smile curved

and squeezed it

about him that I couldn’t put

could barely keep eye contact with me and he threw his gaze down again, staring

of my hand

"lan,"

I said slowly.

"Yeah?"

happen to us

saying, "Well, your body's gonna recover.Things might be hard at first but you're the strongest girl I know.You'll make it through.You'll be back at

all those nice things about me, but he

the

we planned,"The smile on his face turned to a

turned his face away again, avoiding

"Emma..."he started.

"What?"

think we should do this

caught me by

hearing him right, but that look on his

“What do you mean?"

too far," he paused

we're doing.We're way in over our heads,What was he saying? Why was he saying

I croaked, 

everything that we’ve

I’m not

it, and he was pulling

about? I love you.And okay, what happened was terrible, but like you said, I’m still here.We can work through

was making him act this way, I was determined to snap him out of it.We belong together, we were perfect for each

you realize the gravity of the situation here," he pulled his

situation?" I

he stood up and yelled, pointing out the fact that we were sitting on a hospital bed with

for me.I can't let that happen!" his breaths were ragged, but he was trying

Emma.I do.I always have and I always will.But my being with you is far too destructive, for you and for

give

it's best if we take some

up.I’m gonna go to college

won't be there?"he cut me

if I don’t get that job and I

can stay here too.I'll go

cut me

you see? That's

"What's the problem?"

off of each other.That's not right.You have to do what’s best for you and I have to do what's best for me.I can’t hold you back and I can’t

can’t let me what? Hold you back?"

let you throw your life away from me,"he replied

I’m not throwing my life away..." I paused and let out a deep sigh,

the problem right there,"he

you talking

decided to get rid of the baby.But the next day you called me and said you can’t do it.And then I looked for you all over town and

"That's too fuckin’ much,"

the baby, okay? I’m not pregnant anymore.You got your

hold on to whatever that was left here, but I guess I was holding

think I wished for this happen? Is that what you

that way,"I shook my head quickly, but it

as he said, "But

tried to reach for his hand but

Things just can't go back

wouldn't even look at me.I was losing him, or maybe I already did.He had decided on this the moment he stepped into the room.It felt like my heart was being ripped apart and torn to