Teacher's Girl (Aflyingwhale)

EMMA’s POV : 

lan was standing at the door.He looked tired, disheveled, and there was this sadness in his eyes.But he was still my lan.

I was so relieved to see him in front of me.The moment I saw him standing there, my heart was doing backflips and I wished I could jump out of this bed and hug him.But I was still too weak, so all I could do was smile at him.  

"Hey, "I said softly.

"Hi,"he moved closer and closed the door behind him.

"How are you feeling—"

"I've missed you," I cut him off quickly.

I missed him so much, I couldn't hold it in anymore.I was so happy to see him, but then I also felt super self- conscious.I had been sitting in this hospital bed for a week.

Sure, I took a shower and all, but I probably looked terrible.I still had scars and bruises all over my face and body from the accident.As if he knew what I was thinking about, that sadness in his eyes was showing again.He put his gaze down as if he was in pain and stalked closer to the bed.

When he reached the side of my bed, he stopped and looked up at me.His eyes were glistening.

"I missed you too,"he paused for a moment and his hand reached for my face.

I leaned my face to the palm of his hand and he squeezed my cheek gently.He then took a deep breath and said, "I’m so sorry.I’m so sorry for everything,"

"No, I’m the one who should apologize..." I shook my head slowly.

My voice cracked when I spoke because I saw how broken he was.

All this time I was thinking about myself and my own feelings, I had forgotten that lan was hurting too.

"Why are you apologizing?"he said softly.

"Because...Because I was selfish and immature.I didn’t handle the situation right.I was confused and I just shut you out...and then I did something very reckless and stupid and I..."I could stop the tears from streaming down my face as I said, "I lost our baby...I'm really sorry,"

I was full on sobbing at this point and lan grabbed me and pulled me into his chest.He held onto me tightly as I cried into his shirt.

"It's not your fault, Emma.It's okay,"

he cooed me and stroked the back of my head.

"It is my fault.It’s all my fault.I messed everything up..."

my voice was muffled because I buried face into his chest.

"No, you don't,"

"Yes, I did,"

"No, look, you’re here and you're okay.That's all that matters,"he said as he tilted my face up.

He stared at me with this look of deep longing, and I thought he was going to kiss me.But instead, he leaned his forehead down and rested it against mine.He breathed me in and I breathed him in, and we just stayed like that for a while.

"I was so scared I was gonna lose you,"he whispered.

"You're never gonna lose me," I said as I gripped the back of his head.

I was leaning my face forward and pulling him in for a kiss, our lips almost touched, but then he pulled away quickly.

"lan?"

"You look really tired.I think I should let you rest for a while,"he said nervously.

"No, I’m fine," I said reassuringly.

"Are you sure?"

really weak, but I'm

smile curved up

my hand in his and squeezed

the air, something different about him that I couldn’t put my finger around

with me and he threw his gaze down again, staring at my hand

the back of my hand and it was a soothing

"lan,"

I said slowly.

"Yeah?"

gonna happen to

I know.You'll make it through.You'll be back at school in no time, cheerleading

but he only replied with ‘you’.He said all those nice things about me, but he didn’t say anything about

college in the fall with you, right?"I

on his face turned to a

and turned his

"Emma..."he started.

"What?"

think we should do

words caught

on his face was clear as day.He was serious about what

“What do you mean?"

we have to stop.This has gotten way, way too far," he paused for a moment and let out a

doing.We're way in over our heads,What was he saying? Why was he saying all this? Where did this come from? "Are you

I croaked, 

that

not

to me as he said it, and he

I love you.And okay, what happened was terrible, but like you said, I’m still here.We can work through this,"I

way, I was determined to snap him out of

gravity of the situation here," he pulled his hand away forcefully and raked his hair with his

situation?" I snapped

you! You almost died!" he stood up and yelled, pointing out the fact that we were sitting on a hospital bed with my

life and future for me.I can't let that happen!" his breaths were ragged, but he was

"I love you, Emma.I do.I always have and I always will.But my being with you is

what? You're just gonna give up

best if we take some time apart to figure

planned up.I’m gonna go to college on the east coast and

if I won't be there?"he cut me off

job and I have

go

me

you see?

"What's the problem?"

each other.That's not right.You have to do what’s best for you and I have to do what's best for me.I can’t hold you

let me what? Hold you back?" I spat when he

can’t let you throw your life away from

I paused and let out a deep sigh,

that’s the problem right there,"he stated again.

you

of the baby.But the next day you called me and said you can’t do it.And then I looked for you all

"That's too fuckin’ much,"

okay..I lost the baby, okay? I’m not pregnant anymore.You got your wish.Why can’t we just go back to the way

that was left here, but

I wished for this happen? Is that what you think

I didn’t mean it that way,"I shook my head quickly,

as he said, "But you

to reach for his hand but he moved

something like this happens again? Things just can't go back to the way

wouldn't even look at me.I was losing him, or maybe I already did.He had decided on this the moment he stepped into the room.It felt like my heart was being ripped apart and torn to