Teacher's Girl (Aflyingwhale)

EMMA’s POV : 

lan was standing at the door.He looked tired, disheveled, and there was this sadness in his eyes.But he was still my lan.

I was so relieved to see him in front of me.The moment I saw him standing there, my heart was doing backflips and I wished I could jump out of this bed and hug him.But I was still too weak, so all I could do was smile at him.  

"Hey, "I said softly.

"Hi,"he moved closer and closed the door behind him.

"How are you feeling—"

"I've missed you," I cut him off quickly.

I missed him so much, I couldn't hold it in anymore.I was so happy to see him, but then I also felt super self- conscious.I had been sitting in this hospital bed for a week.

Sure, I took a shower and all, but I probably looked terrible.I still had scars and bruises all over my face and body from the accident.As if he knew what I was thinking about, that sadness in his eyes was showing again.He put his gaze down as if he was in pain and stalked closer to the bed.

When he reached the side of my bed, he stopped and looked up at me.His eyes were glistening.

"I missed you too,"he paused for a moment and his hand reached for my face.

I leaned my face to the palm of his hand and he squeezed my cheek gently.He then took a deep breath and said, "I’m so sorry.I’m so sorry for everything,"

"No, I’m the one who should apologize..." I shook my head slowly.

My voice cracked when I spoke because I saw how broken he was.

All this time I was thinking about myself and my own feelings, I had forgotten that lan was hurting too.

"Why are you apologizing?"he said softly.

"Because...Because I was selfish and immature.I didn’t handle the situation right.I was confused and I just shut you out...and then I did something very reckless and stupid and I..."I could stop the tears from streaming down my face as I said, "I lost our baby...I'm really sorry,"

I was full on sobbing at this point and lan grabbed me and pulled me into his chest.He held onto me tightly as I cried into his shirt.

"It's not your fault, Emma.It's okay,"

he cooed me and stroked the back of my head.

"It is my fault.It’s all my fault.I messed everything up..."

my voice was muffled because I buried face into his chest.

"No, you don't,"

"Yes, I did,"

"No, look, you’re here and you're okay.That's all that matters,"he said as he tilted my face up.

He stared at me with this look of deep longing, and I thought he was going to kiss me.But instead, he leaned his forehead down and rested it against mine.He breathed me in and I breathed him in, and we just stayed like that for a while.

"I was so scared I was gonna lose you,"he whispered.

"You're never gonna lose me," I said as I gripped the back of his head.

I was leaning my face forward and pulling him in for a kiss, our lips almost touched, but then he pulled away quickly.

"lan?"

"You look really tired.I think I should let you rest for a while,"he said nervously.

"No, I’m fine," I said reassuringly.

"Are you sure?"

still feel really weak, but

smile curved up

my hand in his and squeezed it gently, saying, "That's

was something in the air, something different about him that I couldn’t put my finger around

could barely keep eye contact with me and he threw his gaze down again, staring at my

circles on the back of my hand and it was a soothing gesture,

"lan,"

I said slowly.

"Yeah?"

gonna happen

and let out a smile, saying, "Well, your body's gonna recover.Things might be hard at first but you're the strongest girl I know.You'll make it through.You'll be back at school in no time, cheerleading or swimming, and hanging out with your friends.You'll hear from colleges soon and then you'll go to college in the

‘us’, but he only replied with ‘you’.He said all those nice things about me, but he didn’t say anything about

college in the fall with you, right?"I

his face

and turned his face away

"Emma..."he started.

"What?"

we should do this

words caught me by

look on

“What do you mean?"

have to stop.This has gotten way, way too far,"

was he saying all this?

I croaked, 

after everything that we’ve been

I’m not

up to me as he said it, and he was pulling his hand away, but I held onto

you.And okay, what happened was terrible, but like you

to snap him out of it.We belong together, we were perfect for each other.It was no use

here," he pulled

situation?" I

almost died!" he stood up and yelled, pointing out the fact that we were sitting on a hospital bed

and future for me.I can't let that happen!" his breaths were ragged, but he was trying his best to

did, his voice turned back to normal and he said, "I love you, Emma.I do.I always have and I always will.But my being with you is far too destructive, for you and

You're just gonna give up on us?"I asked in

it's best if we take some time apart to

what out? We've gone through this.We've got our future all planned up.I’m gonna go

if I won't be there?"he cut me

that job and I have

too.I'll go to college in the state

me

you see? That's

"What's the problem?"

you and I

can’t let me what? Hold you back?" I spat when he couldn't finish his

you throw your life away from me,"he replied

I paused and

problem right

you

to get rid of the baby.But the next day you called me and said you can’t do it.And then I looked for you all over town and I couldn't find you, and then your

"That's too fuckin’ much,"

okay..I lost the baby, okay? I’m not pregnant anymore.You got your wish.Why can’t we just go back to the way things

hold on to whatever that was

Is that what you think

way,"I shook

gaze turned cold as he said,

tried to reach for his hand but

again? Things just can't go back to the way they were anymore,

touch him.He wouldn't even look at me.I was losing him, or maybe I already did.He had decided on this the moment he stepped into the room.It felt like my heart was being ripped apart and torn