Teacher's Girl (Aflyingwhale)

EMMA’s POV : 

lan was standing at the door.He looked tired, disheveled, and there was this sadness in his eyes.But he was still my lan.

I was so relieved to see him in front of me.The moment I saw him standing there, my heart was doing backflips and I wished I could jump out of this bed and hug him.But I was still too weak, so all I could do was smile at him.  

"Hey, "I said softly.

"Hi,"he moved closer and closed the door behind him.

"How are you feeling—"

"I've missed you," I cut him off quickly.

I missed him so much, I couldn't hold it in anymore.I was so happy to see him, but then I also felt super self- conscious.I had been sitting in this hospital bed for a week.

Sure, I took a shower and all, but I probably looked terrible.I still had scars and bruises all over my face and body from the accident.As if he knew what I was thinking about, that sadness in his eyes was showing again.He put his gaze down as if he was in pain and stalked closer to the bed.

When he reached the side of my bed, he stopped and looked up at me.His eyes were glistening.

"I missed you too,"he paused for a moment and his hand reached for my face.

I leaned my face to the palm of his hand and he squeezed my cheek gently.He then took a deep breath and said, "I’m so sorry.I’m so sorry for everything,"

"No, I’m the one who should apologize..." I shook my head slowly.

My voice cracked when I spoke because I saw how broken he was.

All this time I was thinking about myself and my own feelings, I had forgotten that lan was hurting too.

"Why are you apologizing?"he said softly.

"Because...Because I was selfish and immature.I didn’t handle the situation right.I was confused and I just shut you out...and then I did something very reckless and stupid and I..."I could stop the tears from streaming down my face as I said, "I lost our baby...I'm really sorry,"

I was full on sobbing at this point and lan grabbed me and pulled me into his chest.He held onto me tightly as I cried into his shirt.

"It's not your fault, Emma.It's okay,"

he cooed me and stroked the back of my head.

"It is my fault.It’s all my fault.I messed everything up..."

my voice was muffled because I buried face into his chest.

"No, you don't,"

"Yes, I did,"

"No, look, you’re here and you're okay.That's all that matters,"he said as he tilted my face up.

He stared at me with this look of deep longing, and I thought he was going to kiss me.But instead, he leaned his forehead down and rested it against mine.He breathed me in and I breathed him in, and we just stayed like that for a while.

"I was so scared I was gonna lose you,"he whispered.

"You're never gonna lose me," I said as I gripped the back of his head.

I was leaning my face forward and pulling him in for a kiss, our lips almost touched, but then he pulled away quickly.

"lan?"

"You look really tired.I think I should let you rest for a while,"he said nervously.

"No, I’m fine," I said reassuringly.

"Are you sure?"

but I'm feeling much

small smile curved up

my hand in his and

something different about him that I couldn’t put

contact with me and he threw his gaze down

circles on the back of my hand and it was

"lan,"

I said slowly.

"Yeah?"

gonna happen to

might be hard at first but you're the strongest girl I know.You'll make it through.You'll be back at school in no time, cheerleading or swimming, and hanging out with your friends.You'll hear from colleges soon

‘you’.He said all those nice things about me, but

to college in the fall

we planned,"The smile on his face turned

hard and turned his face away again, avoiding

"Emma..."he started.

"What?"

we should do this

caught

I wasn’t hearing him right, but that look on his face was clear as day.He was serious about

“What do you mean?"

way too far," he

don’t know what we're doing.We're way in over our heads,What was he saying? Why was he saying all this? Where did this come from? "Are you breaking

I croaked, 

everything that we’ve been

not good for

said it, and he was pulling his hand away, but I

you.And okay, what happened was terrible, but like you said, I’m still here.We can work through this,"I

him out of it.We belong together, we

of the situation here," he pulled his hand away

I snapped

you! You almost died!" he stood up and yelled, pointing out the fact that we were sitting on a hospital bed with my arm all hooked up to an

gave up your entire life and future for me.I can't let that happen!" his breaths were ragged, but he was trying his best to pull his

his voice turned back to normal and he said, "I love you, Emma.I do.I always have and I always will.But my being with you is far too destructive, for you and for me.I can't do that

just gonna give

if we take some time apart to figure everything

up.I’m gonna go to college on the east

be there?"he

I don’t get that job and I have to stay

I can stay here too.I'll go to college

cut me

see?

"What's the problem?"

have to do what’s best for you and I have to do what's best for me.I can’t hold you back and I can’t

what? Hold you back?" I spat when he couldn't finish his

throw your life away

not throwing my life away..." I paused and let out a

the problem right there,"he

you

all of this...it was too much too fast.Just a week ago, you told me you were pregnant.Then I thought we decided to get rid of the baby.But the next day you called me and said you can’t do it.And then I looked for you all over town and I couldn't find you, and

"That's too fuckin’ much,"

pregnant anymore.You got your wish.Why can’t we

to whatever that was left here, but I guess

this happen? Is that what you think

mean it that way,"I shook my head quickly, but it didn’t

gaze turned cold as he said, "But you

to reach for his hand

something like this happens again? Things just can't go back to

already did.He had decided on this the moment he stepped into the room.It felt like my heart was being ripped apart and torn to pieces.I was so