The Carrero Contract - Selling Your Soul (Mafia Romance)

‘All it takes is one jerk to take that gun from me, in a fight or a fumble because I hesitate, or he’s just quicker and turns it back to become my end instead of my protection. I would rather not tip the balance of outcomes by carrying something that could be used on me, Alexi. It’s not me. I don’t want to walk around always aware of that thing under my dress, always worried that I might have need of it because it’s there. I know how my brain works, and if you make me walk around with it, I’m going to be a nervous wreck, always fixating on the fact it’s there. Let’s be honest, in your world, danger aimed at me is always going to be male and probably trained a lot better than I will ever be. It won’t be something that keeps me safe. It will make me feel the exact opposite.’ It’s not really the speech I had prepared last night because under that angry scrutiny of grey eyes piercing my skull it’s hard to think straight, but it’s sort of the gist of what I decided—In a rushed effort to get it out before he explodes.

Alexi shakes his head angrily staring off across the car park, and I can tell he’s trying to curb an outburst. He’s pissed at my reasoning, his jaw squaring and tightening as he grits his teeth. A sign he doesn’t agree, but I am set on this. I don’t want it and I don’t want to carry something like that on me, ever. I don’t let him verbalise it though. Best to get in before he starts a fight. Throw on the sweetener and appeal to his smart part.

‘Look … If it’s a tossup between that hunk of metal or being flanked constantly by black-clothed psychos you deem appropriate protection, then I’ll take the latter and give you no shit about it. Tie Jackson to me for all I care. I would rather him than a gun and I’m not going to back down on this.’ I exhale with the last words, relieved I got to say it and now wait with added tension for a reaction.

‘Until the first time you dodge him and take off on your own?’ He snaps at me, a throwback to me giving Mico the slip in the Hamptons, and my stomach lurches at the peak of pissed off Carrero. Furious going on under that seemingly calm expression but all his little signs are evident … Tense body, tensed jaw and rolling storms in the depths of his grey eyes. That brain is hovering over his rage button being flicked, and I need to tread very carefully. Appeal to his sane side. Something I always avoided before, but realise now that outright defiance makes him flip so easily. Reasonable cajoling just makes him simmer.

There are ways to handle him and I am slowly learning it makes a difference sometimes. Alexi isn’t as complex as I used to think, he just requires someone to read his tells and avoid his triggers. Pander to him a little. He has an ego, a bad temper and a need to be in control of all things. He hates being undermined and I used to do it frequently. I see that now.

He’s a man child, a sinister, powerful one, but still … definitely a man child.

‘I promise you. I know this is for my protection, I won’t do that again. I know you only want me to be safe and protected and the gun was for my own safety.’ I’m trying for submissive, soft tones and gentle words, genuine soothing of his ruffled feathers. I lock eyes on his to show him I mean it, but he’s moving on his feet, shifting; that need to expel energy brimming inside of him.

I can tell he has a whole lot going on in his head and he wants to tell me it’s his way or no way, yet something is holding him back. I’m waiting on the eruption, but all I am getting is a very controlled, if not angry Alexi and his inability to look directly at me. He keeps clenching and unclenching his jaw, his fist, and staring across the park as though answers will magically appear before his eyes. Atmosphere thick and tense between us as I stand and internally tremble in anticipation of the war I am predicting. Then finally, he turns back to me.

‘Jackson will never leave your side; he will walk you to and from the fucking apartment morning, noon and night. You come out here for air … he does too. You want to go upstairs mid-night for a fucking aspirin, he goes too. You want to go get a bikini wax or a lingerie shopping trip then HE GOES TOO.’ He snarls it at me, voice raised angrily, rage clearly building at my refusal and as much as I’m taken aback by just how venomous this topic has made him, I nod mutely.

Obedience. That’s what he wants right now.

Give him that!

If I spark at him, he will spark right back and this will explode between us. I’m too much of a fiery person when he is this way, and he is a volatile person that I seem to be able to rile. I remain silent and keep that innocent look on my face so as not to push him further.

Alexi throws himself into his seat without another word, just another filthy glare because I made him mad, and he slams the door shut. I guess he decided getting away from me is the best thing for both of us and I get out of the way, walking back across the park to the steps to give him space to leave.

A little happy at it though. Avoiding imminent death.

I can feel his eyes burning into me as he starts the purring motor with an aggressive roar, pulling out in reverse to back up to face the gate at speed. He's pissed. He needs to simmer, but he agreed—which is huge!!! I coerced the great dictator and I barely broke a sweat.

I think it’s the fact he had to back down and accept something against his wishes that has him madder than hell, but it’s a little victory for me. I made Alexi back down and all it took was some gentle coaxing instead of outright defiance. I should remember that in future. It may come in handy.

automatically slide open. Security watches from above to remotely trigger it for cars coming

he pulls forward, eyes still on me, I panic. Action over thought and I literally jump into the path of his car trying to leave

and hysteria as I try to protect that mangy,

abruptly, very dramatically, and rips himself out of that seat like a tornado in a split second; A furious, venomous growl thrown my

I throw my head round to see furball scurrying back under the closest vehicle in fright and heave a sigh of relief. My body collapsing inwards

way. Eyes scanning the ground as he searches for whatever the fuck a feral is, rage

FUCKING CAT? You made me almost hit you for a fucking cat!!!!’

and I recoil a little; definitely terrified

kill it.’ Tears well up because he’s scaring me right now, memories of how

it would be a kindness. I can’t believe you risked your life for a mangy flea-bitten creature! GET OFF THE FUCKING ROAD.’ Alexi booms loudly and this time I move fast, eyes full of moisture as my body starts to visibly shake

me, you’re scaring me,’ I wail back tearfully, sobbing suddenly and overly sensitive and emotional to his reaction. Alexi just turns

didn’t spend four months searching the country for you to fucking run you

new persona. Alexi is still a wanker, and through watery sniffs and acting

again, aggressively chucks himself back in his car and takes

stop to take a second look and storm into the lobby

for hours, most of the day, and I have been on tenterhooks waiting for his

up and down to update me on the calls she’s making and how many of our clientele have renewed membership. She’s been at it all afternoon and just pissing me off endlessly. Her face

but I can still tell he’s pissed from the tight

and think up heinous ways to make me suffer for annoying him, and this will be a true test of whether our relationship ends today. I feel sick with

Never again!

a t-shirt and jeans, over trainers now, gym clothes gone and even though he looks casual and almost human, that air of psycho is cloaking him. He carries that danger around with him so

casually too, similar outfit and I wonder if he was at the training session with him. It’s rare to see those two dressed out of the Mafia uniform on any given day and never at the same time. Mico smiles my way and I wave back softly, a hint of one on my lips

bristling with nerves and my insides are doing a good impersonation of a washing machine, now he’s here. Alexi glares and turns his back on me and heads to

restocking the imported booze that arrived today, speciality brands for specific members, and

jumps to action and I bury my

making a bee line for him instead of me, with the papers in her hand. I can practically smell her desperation

stool and beams at him adoringly. Sticking her tits out and pasting on a demure pouty look as

witnessing this little encounter. I hated watching him with her before and now it’s unbearable, not knowing what she has been to him for the past few