How far from the hotel did we stray? Seems like an eternity.
I need to get out of this stifling car. Take deep breaths to both cool and calm myself.
“You’re all of those things, Emma, and I think partly, because of the shit you endured.” He sighs heavily. He truly doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
“You’re also allowed to be human and … vulnerable … You’re allowed to let someone in. Let me in!” he’s almost pleading at me.
“Not with my job, Mr. Carrero.” I smile emptily, my voice lighter while trying to sound normal, wishing to end the tension between us. Even though he doesn’t reciprocate, his eyes soften, and I wipe away my tears, turning to him once again. Calm and in control once more.
“Even with your job,” he answers gently, reaching out and taking my fingers in his tenderly, entwining them with mine and leaving our hands on the leather seat between us. I don’t look down, but the warmth of his touch sends a small reassurance through me. Fully bringing me to calm.
“I think the boss would soon have something to say if I reverted to some feeble, emotional victim who wept over old scars, don’t you?” I smile, hoping to turn this conversation back to our usual banter. Release this heavy fog like tension around us.
“The boss would be an idiot if he did.” He looks over at me, a hint of a sad flicker. No fun and flirty from Jake, he’s still in serious mode.
“My boss is sometimes an idiot.” I flutter at him cheekily. “He gets me drunk, irrationally drunk and lets me fall apart when he should know better.”
truly yourself around him. That, and it’s easier to seduce you when you can’t see straight.” Finally, I catch that glint of cheeky in his eye. He visibly
To take advantage of me!” I shake my head, mood fully restored to tipsy mellow, everything fading away, and I’m glad that we’ve steered away from
Maybe … Yes. Damn, you caught me!” he’s smiling, but it doesn’t reach his eyes and I know he’s still digesting what he’s learned about me. I didn’t want him to know any of that stuff.
men tried to molest. A slutty girl who encouraged it maybe? Her own father couldn’t even look at her, was too disgusted
and self-loathing rising out from the fiery depths once
do this, Jake.” I utter quietly. Looking down at our hands, held together so weirdly fitted and
the cab? Let me take advantage of you?” he glances at me a
it.” I breathe out honestly,
“Why?”
this is harder than I thought it could be. He shakes his head and pulls me close to him across the seat, releasing my hand to bring an
you never did anything wrong … You didn’t ask for any of it.” His green eyes lock on
it comes out from somewhere inside of me, causing a sharp pain in my chest and I hate that alcohol causes this verbal diarrhea. Anytime I think I have a handle on it, teen Emma blurts
It makes them the sick fucks. I would destroy every single one of them to prove to you that this isn’t your fault.” The conviction and fire in his voice and eyes makes me want to curl up in his lap again. I know that he means it, that he’s capable of it. I can’t let
I’ve never opened up about this, never cried about it to anyone, except him and I feel nauseous at the thought that Jake just saw all of that. I want to
he’s going to push
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