The Carrero Effect - Falling for the Boss (Billionaire CEO)

I finally get home to the apartment in the early hours; Jake had two cars awaiting us at the airfield, so I didn’t need to share the journey to his apartment first. This was a new move for him, we’ve always shared cars coming home, so this spoke volumes about what he’s feeling about me.

He never looked at me once in our entire trip. At the car, he just guided Marissa into his and departed, left me standing in the dark with Jefferson. Empty and broken hearted, aching to have him say something, anything to me. I almost burst into tears right then and there.

Sarah’s in bed and I know, without checking, that Marcus is here too, I can sense his presence in the house and smell his scent lingering in the air. Cheap cologne and deodorant. The thought makes me uptight, but I ignore it and go to bed, taking sleeping pills before I lay down. I’m going to need them; my head is so full to bursting that I know if I even try and extract one tiny piece it will unravel like a chaos of elastic bands. That I’ll unravel, and I’m so done with that kind of pain and turmoil.

* * *

I wake to the sounds of Sarah making breakfast, my head groggy, but at least I managed to sleep. A dreamless black haze and the usual night tremors waking me early before I finally dozed again. The aftereffects of the pills are not great, my mouth is fuzzy, and I feel hungover, so I venture through in my robe for a drink, seeing her moving from stove to worktop effortlessly. The kitchen has always been her territory and it shows in her graceful, easy movements. She seems different this morning though, tired, and uptight.

“Hey,” I breathe, and she startles at my voice then breaks into a warm smile. I notice the lack luster in her normally bright eyes causing the hint of concern to unravel inside of me.

“Hey, stranger … God, I love your hair, when did you do that?” she gushes at me, the tight look dissipating quickly. I automatically reach up and tug on a strand self-consciously and shrug.

“Felt like a change.” I respond emptily.

Has it really been that long since we have been in each other’s company?

“You look so different … So un-Emma,” she giggles and continues to work, returning to the stove. “You hungry?” she goes back to focusing on the batter she’s mixed up and drops some in the pan she’s oiled.

I tolerate food while my insides are violently rejecting life? I notice the pile of letters on the surface and rake through to give myself a task, flinching at the ones addressed to Marcus and cast her an accusatory

I had a new roommate?” I utter

… I get so lonely.” Her voice wavers and I’m hit by sudden guilt from

Lonely? Sarah?

her up and down, my mind racing over recent months, pushing further back … I guess I have

first time, seeing it from a different viewpoint. I’ve left her alone so many times, assuming she has everything she needs. That she didn’t need me. No one else ever did and I never gave

out from a deep recess as the walls start to crumble; her head snaps around, staring at me in confusion. Overwhelming shame and guilt hits me hard in the gut, almost winding me and I struggle to inhale. “I’m

losing the plot,

her pan and ladle, rushing to my side and cradling me awkwardly in her arms as the tears start to course down my face in a

what have you done with Emma?” she laughs, an anxious edge in her voice as her breath warms

back in, embarrassed by my behavior, but in a way relieved. Sarah has never seen this side of me and maybe it’s time I let her in on the fact that I’m not the strong capable shell of a person she has known so long, after all - I am so tired of pretending. “I’m really sorry,

actually know how to react.” There’s a definite edge

I’ve pushed her so far into the background of my life in a bid to forget who I was that I forgot about her, how much she used to mean to me. I’ve left her floundering in my past and never realized she needed a place in my present. She squeezes me back, the hesitation in her

in her eyes too, confused, unsure, but overwhelmed mostly and she

He’s broken me open and let the parts of me I try to contain leak out everywhere, the cracks growing so wide I can never piece them back together. He’s made me face emotions I have always been so afraid of feeling, or letting other people see. I was

would really love to give him one huge kiss right now.” She grins at me, her eyes full of love and