The Carrero Heart - Beginning (Friends to Lovers)

The walk back is odd, we’re walking apart, my arms across my body as I feel like being by myself right now and not having the contact. I’m tired and emotional and edgy. He’s trying to make idle chit chat, intent on keeping us talking about any topic he comes up with and I am responding, but I am fully aware of his constant fixed gaze on my profile as we walk and it’s starting to make me nervy. I can’t relax with the way he seems honed into my every movement and mannerism.

“You can stop staring at me for like maybe five minutes.” I point out and smile when his eyebrows dip in that cute way he has. He looks away for a minute and then back again.

“You noticed, huh?” He acts coyly and shrugs my way. Not him at all, he’s always been super confident in every way and this seems weird.

“Just a little, you know … penetrating gaze latched onto my skull.” I giggle at him, even more so with how sheepish he’s become since I pointed it out and let go of the tension a little.

“I can’t help it. I spent months missing this view, dreaming about you, and I’m worried that if I look away you might disappear again.” His tone immediately turns serious and his eyes, although still facing my way seem less zoned in on me and I relax a little.

“I guess I know what you mean.” I agree, knowing that I too am getting used to his sudden presence again and it still feels unreal and dreamlike. That the last months are some sort of alternate dimension now. He was in my head so many times in his absence that his real presence isn’t quite normal to me yet either.

“I missed you. I know it was my fault, but it doesn’t take away how much it sucked. You’re like a sunset to me or a pretty view of a shoreline. Some people like art, they like watching the sea. I’ve always liked looking at you. You have a unique kind of beauty, and are the most breath-taking view on the planet.” The seriousness of his statement makes my heart ache suddenly and tears prick my eyes, knowing fine well he means every word and I don’t know how to react. There’s a silent moment as we both look away; he clears his throat and I fiddle with my fingers awkwardly. Affected by how sweet he can be and so genuine, still afraid to let him see that he gets to me though.

“You’re so lame.” I breathe out through intense emotional reaction, swallowing down tears and his laugh breaks the tension.

pulls me to him by the upper arm and finds no resistance. Bending in cautiously and slowly moving in towards my mouth. I see it coming a mile off, the way his eyes focus on mine as though seeking permission before he kisses me softly. His nose rubs mine, his lips part slightly and I surrender to it,

he can kiss me properly. It reminds me of the night Emma had Ava, only so much more intense and he doesn’t pull away. He kisses me until a passing honk of a horn makes us break apart, giggling awkwardly when we realize we have probably been making out in full view for minutes. Oblivious to everything

of public displays of lovey-doveyness, just made love to my

still caught in the tender moment even if we are no longer lip to lip. I nod, unable to formulate a reply while he looks at me exactly this way. Heart bounding crazily in

Sophie. I finally know how it feels to kiss the girl you will only ever kiss again from here until eternity.”

parts of me on show

… I swear. Hurting you hurts me too. I just

***

finally show face.” I smile, stifling a yawn, very glad of the suggestion of some sleep. The sudden awakening this morning was bright and

the door he locks it and heads back to my bed, taking a little

the bed, pinning me down so he comes nose to nose with me, nestled against my body in a perfect fit. His eyes scan my face, the hint of a smile at the corner of his mouth and one dimple shining through, I gaze right back into the depths of his eyes. Finally, feeling completely at

with me, Sophs, stay with me tonight at my apartment.” He watches me, frowning a little as I break into a smile, pushing him off so I can slide to my side to face him instead; his arms come around me, pulling me in so he can bring his nose back to mine. I guess letting him make out with me has brought back the ‘she’s never off-limits

do to Emma a million times and for a moment it’s weird to see what exactly is a Carrero trait, rather than a Jake or an

expression turns serious, pushing his forehead against mine a little more. I shove him away playfully and give him