The Carrero Heart - Beginning (Friends to Lovers)

“You will be fine, baby cakes. Just man up and seduce him before you tell him.” Christian laughs down the phone, supportive as ever and I sigh. Nerves splayed, stomach churning and tapping my fingers on the counter impatiently.

“I think he might get mad. Or upset. I don’t know.” I stare at the wall of the apartment, facing the entertainment unit with it’s million and one framed pictures of us from the last year. The smiling happy trips and the cute couple snaps from favorite selfies. His lounge is looking less refined and manly nowadays, with the addition of throws, fluffy cushions and a manner of pink and sparkles mixed through all the grey and cool tone things. His domain has slowly been morphing over the months into a girly love pad and he doesn’t seem to care, even though it’s not as prim and neat as it used to be.

“No, he won’t. He never seems to get mad at you. He will sigh and smile and do whatever it is you ask of him, like he always does. You have that puppy wrapped around your little pinkie and you know it.” Christian is being annoyingly upbeat today. I guess he chose his holiday with James to stay in bed, again, seeing as that’s all they seem to do now they are officially cohabiting. Much like Arry and I.

Moving in here was the best decision I ever made and living with him has made us closer than ever. Not that sometimes he doesn’t want to string me up for being a completely messy house mate, but he’s easy to placate. I just have to get naked and he’s over it.

“I’m not sure I even want it, I’ll miss you guys so much.” I play with a strand of my hair, longer now as I’ve been growing it out a little and stare at its light highlighted color, tugging it in front of me nervously. Trying to curb my edgy tension.

“You know that we shouldn’t hold you back. Jenny is leaving anyway. Married with a bun in the oven has really redirected her priorities, and what with Nathan opening his own marketing company to promote more fighters. I think she’s happy to be one of those stay home and adore my kids type of people.” Christian sighs, as I do. We attended the crazily unexpected wedding a few months ago, that seemed to come out of the blue after those two got into a very serious relationship and found out she was pregnant.

She’s happy though, and the unplanned baby seems to make her more so. Nathan turned out to be more than capable of being a one-woman man after all and is all for the new life he is giving her, if not a little old fashioned in the whole ‘You’re not giving birth to my baby until our names match.’ I honestly never saw that one coming at all. I think they will make it though; he seems to adore her as much as she adores him, and he stopped playing games with her heart the second he told her so.

“I know, but I still see her. If I go, then I won’t see you both for a year, Chris.” a sob stifles in my throat at verbalizing it and the doubts all flood straight back in, winding me in the gut. I haul over the unicorn mug that now holds cold coffee and play with the handle.

“We’ll keep this place warm for you. You need to follow your heart, chase your dreams. You can go places with your talents, Sophs, don’t let us hold you back.” He sounds hoarse, a touch emotional too and I let the tears erupt a little. I hate that I love them both so much, that the thought of leaving them kills me this way.

“Promise me you’ll visit me?” I sob down the cell phone and sigh heavily to get it all back inside.

“I swear. As often as I can. You don’t lose me that easily, princess.” He seems to be crying too and the ping of the oven alerts my attention.

“I’ll call you tomorrow. I need to go take the food out, he’ll be home soon. I love you, Christian.” I wipe the back of my hand over my face and pull myself together. Sighing heavily and pushing my brain into action with my plans for Arry getting home. Pulling myself together because it’s going to be so much worse talking this over with him.

“Good luck. Wow him with sex and then show him the letter.” He giggles down the line and I eyeroll at his typical suggestion.

“It’s always sex with you. Goodbye.” I laugh at his dramatic goodbye in return and hang up before he drags it out more. Suddenly overcome with apprehension as I move to the oven to remove the food that I’m heating up. Arry has been teaching me the basics of cooking, as he prepares a lot of what I come home to stick in the oven, but it means we eat better and the housekeeper is never short of recipe suggestions.

***

I nervously dish the food onto plates, watching the clock for him to get home from his evening training and fuss around the table. It’s been a weird day; he stayed home late this morning, with me in bed because it’s a rare day off for me and left for work before noon. Whistling as he went because his libido has never failed us in the past year, and he hasn’t really ever stopped wanting to get naked with me every second of every day since.

That’s when I went down for the mail to see him off and discovered the offer from the fashion academy. I’ve been mulling it over for hours, my head churning itself crazy. Unsure what to do or say to him and shocked that they sent me an offer.

I’m top of my class in school and earning recommendations by the truckload. I’ve been recognized for skills and achievements all year, focused on pushing myself to do my best. This is the pay off, and now it’s sat staring at me from the countertop, yet I don’t know what to do.

table beside the salad, trying not to overly focus on how confused I am about the offer. I want him to be happy about

signaling his return and quickly fix the silverware, straightening it all out, holding my palms to my cheeks to cool the flush of heat and paste on a bright smile as the

off his sneakers and smiling my way as he pulls off his sweater. Looking as delicious as he always does and warming my insides with his presence. It never gets old, his coming home is like a warm hug every time, and he’s

array of my jackets that are now overtaking the hallway and makes his way towards me. His hair is damp, suggesting he’s showered already, and I get a sense of relief that I won’t have to wait to do this. Coming level with me he eyes the perfectly laid

with how much affection he showers me

to the moon

stomach like a kick again and that little shiver of anticipation that this is a bad idea. Arrick, as always, in tune to me, senses the change and the crease of concern hits

can study my face and try and work out why I am being cagey. “What is it?” He looks immediately worried and I kiss his nose, untangling from him with a breezy smile that’s supposed to lighten the tension, but I can’t hold it for long. Walking to the counter I pick up the letter, bring it back and hand it to him, my own brow creased in sheer uncertainty. I can’t even formulate what I need to say and know the letter will do it so much better. Hands

no expression that gives me any clues

offered you a scholarship for a year to some French fashion academy?” He beams at me. A real show of pride running across his gorgeous face yet I still get that tight knot of anxiety biting inside. Waiting for him to realize what that means. “You really are

alternative to my year here at the New York design school.” I frown at him, unsure why he is taking this so well when the letter makes it clear that it is in France. Across the world. Feeling fragile at this topic, and not sure if this is how I even wanted him

Not seeing why this would upset me and it only makes me feel worse. Little insecure niggles spiking up, even though they are not

my lip and study his expression, waiting for the outburst, but yet again, he smiles

the simplest question in the world. I stare at him silently for a moment as tears fill my eyes, nodding and then look away as one rolls down my cheek pitifully, really

makes you cry, why?” He smiles at me again, hands coming up to my face and stroking away the

face against his T-shirt instead, sniffing as his arms wrap around me snugly, trying to get some comfort from him while verbally he is giving me none.

Natasha, not since. We seem to work so well, cohabit flawlessly, despite our conflicting personalities where domestic crap is concerned. I don’t get why he would let it go

fly out for fights and leave you for a max of three days. If you’re going to

him hopefully. I feel so stupid that I didn’t even think he would give me this option, so sure it had been

together, always. I don’t need to be here to train. I fight all over the country, and it’s only a flight. It’s not forever. I’m sure Carrero Corp can do without me for a few months. Besides, it’s the city of romance isn’t it? The hell I’m letting you alone out there with your track record of attracting every male who lays eyes on you, you might never come back to me.” He kisses me again, this time harder and

you

that for me? Leave New York so I can go to school in another country?” I dry my eyes ungracefully and wipe my nose on the back of my hand, un-phased by him watching me adoringly. Comfortable in my own skin when it

is important, and I already told you; you need to find your feet and place in this world to be happy, baby. It doesn’t mean I can’t be there with you on that journey.” Arrick leans in and circles his arms around my butt, squeezing firmly and picking me up so I’m suspended, yet taller than he is. He carries me across to the couch and lays me down on my back across it, crawling carefully over the top of me and nestling down so our bodies meet

I sigh heavily, meaning every single word with conviction. Heart full to bursting. I kiss his nose, running

in the heartthrob Hollywood best he saves only for special occasions. Melting me into a bowl of goo and making my

better accept the placement on Monday, right?” I smile, wriggling under him as he shifts over me and

slides his arm underneath and feels around. I watch him with a furrowed brow of wonder. Confused by his sudden intense look of concentration and what the hell he is even doing. He is so accepting of the fact we just committed to move to another country for a year and yet, he is more

to reach, almost pulling both of us off the side we are teetering on. I grip his shoulders in case I do meet floor from the odd

He grins, coming back up, hauling us both back to rights and nuzzling back in, pulling a wrapped box with him. He holds it up

and discards the bag quickly, picking up a package about

right?” He gazes at me with that boyish smile. So much going on behind those eyes as they rest on

a month away now.” I sit up properly, pulling my legs under to one side in the tight dress and stare at the brown wrapped box with a frown of confusion, guessing it’s for me. Gifts are something he does regularly, but