Accidental Surrogate

Chapter 121

Chapter 121

Trigger Warning: This chapter contains experiences of abuse and s3xual assaultnothing explicit, but please take care reading..

Sinclair

Ella’s small body is completely stiff in my arms, even though we’re in her favorite

place. I’ve only bathed with her once before, but it didn’t take a rocket scientist to

figure out how much she loves a bubble bath. She takes at least four a week, and

when she’s upset I’ve known her to have a bath even after showering. Until I spoke

with Cora about Ella’s self-care practices, I didn’t understand the connection to her

childhood experience of neglect, but now that I know I’m determined never to deprive

her of the comfort even if my water bills go through the roof and the city goes into a

drought.

“Are you ready to talk this out, trouble?” I inquire, resting my hands on her round

tummy and feeling a pulse of stress from the baby. A fresh spark of worry assails me,

and I know that Rafe is channeling his mother’s fraught emotions. Ella doesn’t

respond to my question, and I press on, realizing that the poor little wolf isn’t going to

relax until she knows l’m not going to reject her”

Sweetheart, it never even crossed my mind to end things. I love you

Ella’s muscles tighten further, though I didn’t think such a thing was possible.

“But..She stammers, twisting around to look at me, “but you left!”

Im sorry that I walked out.”I reply gently, grazing my knuckles over her cheek. “But it

wasn’t because I ever had doubts about us.”I share, wondering about my sweet

mate’s reaction. I know some survivors of child abuse view any confrontation as a

disaster or threat, but Ella has weathered my anger in the past without any signs of a

trauma response. “I was angry that you thought you don’t contribute anything to our

it when you

of losing you pushed me over the edge, and I needed to calm

continuing.”

I can see her

might end things.” She whispers, staring at

you’d come back.. think.. I think

aware of. And Mike’s betrayal and learning that

into very sharp

gently flip her body the rest of

me completely, I snuggle her to my chest,

she can straddle

kissing her head and stroking her spine. “I

already upset, I just don’t trust myself

mean when I’m that angry. The same way I would never make a

the height of a fury. I think taking some

but maybe we can find some way to

physical distance.” I suggest. “But even if we can’t, you need

I go or how long I stay

you, Ella.”

whimpers, and her arms tighten around

hiccups, “and I’m sorry I said I couldn’t be your Luna, but

I’m not pulling my weight here. This isn’t the

for you and failed.”

me for a moment.” I order, sliding my finger

you take care of me all the

keep

to bullies like the Prince and Lydia, and

want you to. Moreover, I

an Alpha’s DNA to nurture and protect. If you didn’t let me comfort

you, I would be a

“But I didn’t let

recalling the terror that

I suggested tying her up. I’ve growled and grumbled at

my knee and overpowered

most of the time her wolf responds to my bossiness

know this didn’t happen

didn’t I?”

eyes look anywhere but at me.

slight nod, and

so vulnerable that my heart aches. “Do we

that

know that wouldn’t help anything.

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