Accidental Surrogate

Sinclair

Don’t shift, don’t shift, don’t shift. I think manically Ella needs you.

Listening to Ella recount her childhood always makes me furious, but this time is

worse than all the others. I’ve suspected that Ella suffered terrible traumas for some

time now, but before this night l’d been able to pacify my outrage with the hope that

I’m wrong.

No longer.

As Ella speaks, I wonder how she could ever imagine herself weak. I can’t even stand

to listen to her story, but she actually lived it. She sacrificed herself for her sister, and

she survived things I can only imagine

“When the matron realized it was me, she smiled so cruelly that my stomach turnedshe was only too glad to take, me instead of Cora.” Ella continues, shuddering with

the memory. Her unease gives my wolf the push he needed to put aside his own rage

and comfort her. I finally manage a weak purr, and Ella presses her nose to my chest,

breathing in my scent.

“She took me to her own room and put me in her bed, and then she got in with me

and.. started touching me in ways I didn’t like or understand.

She made me touch her too, and she never stopped talking She told me how pretty I

was over and over, and kept asking me if I liked it. I said no, but she just insisted that

this was a special, secret game I was lucky to play. She said everything I was feeling

might be confusing, but it was good and right and natural. She said it took practice,

but that we’d have plenty of time.. Afterwards she took me back to the dorm with a

reminder not to share our secret. Cora asked me what happened but I didn’t know

how to explain.”

“The next day I went to the doctor in residence, and I told him what the matron had

done. I’d never liked him much, but in my heart I knew what had happened was

wrong, and I didn’t know who else to tell. I thought that since it was about my body,

the doctor was the one who could help. There was no such thing as sex ed at the

orphanage and no one else ever talked to us about our bodies. At first I was relieved

to tell someone. The doctor seemed very concerned, and agreed that it sounded

strange.”

he told me that he needed to

and stops now, and

so I know she isn’t cold and I know

my clothes and put

the way he said, ‘now it’s very important

used to, and if you move too much I could

cheeks as she quotes the doctor, and it

he said, T know little girls

so I have these nifty straps to help you.

the table and strapped me down. and then he asked me

I explained he would touch me exactly how she

if I cried or objected,

demand I tell him”

out what he was about, and I

I didn’t

on my

So I answered. I told him how to hurt me.” Ella is interrupted

she looks up at me for the first time since

overflowing, but she offers me a bitter smile and

big bad wolf, it’s

snarl becomes a whine, and Ella determinedy forges on. “I was too

things, but I

happen again, but I was already

Cora who weren’t

no. No, no, no tell me she didn’t!I have a horrible sick feeling in

whisk Ella away from that horrible

could hurt her.

that only would have meant other children would be hurt, which is

My brave, brilliant little mate would never stand by

child be abused… even if it meant being abused

I stopped hiding at night. I gave myself up so the others wouldn’t

couldn’t be ruined more than I already was, and it was better

to be destroyed.” Ella shares, confirming my fears but also

her logic. “The

call me in for check ups every few weeks. I hated those

matron was sort of gentle, and she never tied me down

to inflict pain, she seemed determined to make me like

was a true sadist; he loved my

Ella hides her face in my neck as she concludes her

r*ped me, and that’s when Cora and I ran away.

other girls to run with us, but most were more afraid of living on the street

the matron. Luckily they didn’t know about

to never

tightly on Ella I’m afraid I must be

doesn’t complain.

muscles have unwound now that her story is

own eyes, and I can

she shared.

the doctor?” I finally

hiss.

and I could only live outside during the summers, and we

first winter, but

building and returned us to the orphanage. When we