Accidental Surrogate

Sinclair

Don’t shift, don’t shift, don’t shift. I think manically Ella needs you.

Listening to Ella recount her childhood always makes me furious, but this time is

worse than all the others. I’ve suspected that Ella suffered terrible traumas for some

time now, but before this night l’d been able to pacify my outrage with the hope that

I’m wrong.

No longer.

As Ella speaks, I wonder how she could ever imagine herself weak. I can’t even stand

to listen to her story, but she actually lived it. She sacrificed herself for her sister, and

she survived things I can only imagine

“When the matron realized it was me, she smiled so cruelly that my stomach turnedshe was only too glad to take, me instead of Cora.” Ella continues, shuddering with

the memory. Her unease gives my wolf the push he needed to put aside his own rage

and comfort her. I finally manage a weak purr, and Ella presses her nose to my chest,

breathing in my scent.

“She took me to her own room and put me in her bed, and then she got in with me

and.. started touching me in ways I didn’t like or understand.

She made me touch her too, and she never stopped talking She told me how pretty I

was over and over, and kept asking me if I liked it. I said no, but she just insisted that

this was a special, secret game I was lucky to play. She said everything I was feeling

might be confusing, but it was good and right and natural. She said it took practice,

but that we’d have plenty of time.. Afterwards she took me back to the dorm with a

reminder not to share our secret. Cora asked me what happened but I didn’t know

how to explain.”

“The next day I went to the doctor in residence, and I told him what the matron had

done. I’d never liked him much, but in my heart I knew what had happened was

wrong, and I didn’t know who else to tell. I thought that since it was about my body,

the doctor was the one who could help. There was no such thing as sex ed at the

orphanage and no one else ever talked to us about our bodies. At first I was relieved

to tell someone. The doctor seemed very concerned, and agreed that it sounded

strange.”

me that he

starts and stops now, and

I know she isn’t cold and I know the

off my clothes and put me on the exam table. and then

important

used to, and if you move too much

Ella s cheeks as she quotes the doctor, and it takes all

T know little girls can have

so I have these nifty straps to help you. He pulled

and strapped me down. and then he asked me exactly

I explained he would touch me exactly how she had,

cried or objected, he would only do it

demand I tell him”

so I figured out what he was about, and I didn’t want

but if I didn’t speak he

abuses, always demonstrating them on my body. They

I answered. I told him how to hurt

looks up at me for the first time since she

are overflowing, but she offers me

“It’s okay, big bad wolf, it’s

Ella determinedy forges on. “I was

I knew

it to happen again, but

like Cora who

tell me she didn’t!I have a horrible sick feeling in my

time and whisk Ella

could hurt her.

course, that only would have meant other children would be hurt, which is how

did. My brave, brilliant little mate would

even if

at night. I gave myself

than I already was, and it

be destroyed.” Ella shares, confirming my fears but also

by explaining her logic. “The matron

check ups every few weeks. I hated those visits worse

matron was sort of gentle, and she never tied me down or

inflict pain, she

was a true sadist; he loved my fear, loved

Ella hides her face in

I was twelve he r*ped me, and that’s when Cora and I ran away.

but most were more afraid of living

Luckily they didn’t know about

behind to never confide

are clamped so tightly on Ella I’m afraid

doesn’t complain.

crying, but her muscles have unwound now that her

in my own eyes, and I can only kiss and caress my sweet mate as

she shared.

there? The matron and the doctor?”

hiss.

“Cora and I could only live outside during the summers,

stay away through the first winter, but eventually

us to the orphanage. When we got back