Ex-Husband's Regret

A surprise
It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

1/4

+15 BONUS

can answer that question or think too deeply about it, the bell rings

class without saying a single word to my

lounge. I just want to breathe a little before I have to go to my next class Luckily, no one stops me in the hallway. I wasn’t really in the

to anyone

up. I was expecting it to be at least somewhat

damn packed. I release a groan as I walk to the furthest

down. Nora’s name

given their relationship with Ethan I go to hang up,

accept button instead

she calls

Just release the

shut me out. Don’t shut

at

even if I wanted to. My mouth

fucking word.

I want to be in your life. I

one child, please don’t makeme lose another. Losing you again just after

breaks my heart.

eyes. Damn it. I’ve been so emotional these past few

slowly. Trying to push

that’s what you need, but always remember that I

I’ve always carried you in my heart even when I thought you had died. I hope you can

always be here for

wanted, but I don’t know if I can trust them yet. Only time will

I reply before hanging

but I just don’t know. What if she’s just looking for someone to hang

2/4

+15 BONUS

Of being used. Of being a second choice

Rowan.

wasn’t being cold or anything like that towards

pieces of my heart.

Carol says walking

I groan under

junior highschool teacher and she had a

likes to stick her nose in other

looks at me in shock. “With the way you’ve been eating

would think you’re preggo” she

freeze in my seat. Her words

fear through every fiber

and frowns. “Are you okay, Ava? You have to know that

right?”

I blindly ran through

of the parking lot.

happening. Please

do the math, but my mind is so jumbled that I

not caring that I will probably be pulled for over speeding. I needed to

Carol was wrong.

car and rush out. Unluckily for me, I bump