Ex-Husband's Regret

A surprise
It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

1/4

+15 BONUS

can answer that question or think too deeply

out of my class without saying a single word

down as I rush to the teacher’s lounge. I just want to breathe a little before I have to go

to anyone

freeze up. I was expecting it to be at

packed. I release a groan

as I sit down. Nora’s name flashes. I’ve ignored their calls not really

given their relationship with Ethan I go

accept button instead

she calls

don’t say anything. Just release the breath

me out. Don’t shut me and your father out” she

catching at

even if I wanted to. My mouth

fucking word.

Ava and I want to be in your life. I want to

you. I already lost one child, please don’t makeme lose another. Losing you again just after finding you would kill me” she

breaks my heart.

Damn it. I’ve

tell her slowly.

you time if that’s what you need,

heart even when I thought you had died. I hope you

here for you

to be wanted, but I don’t know if

reply before

What

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+15 BONUS

afraid of. Of being used. Of being a second

Rowan.

anything like that towards them. I was just trying

pieces of my heart.

girl” Carol says

I groan under

highschool teacher and she had a way of

her nose

looks at me in shock. “With the way you’ve been eating and how

preggo” she finishes with a laugh.

she was joking, but I freeze in my seat. Her words ring in my mind like

every fiber of

“Are you okay, Ava? You have to know that I was just

right?”

my body. Rushing out of the lounge, I blindly ran through the hallway till I am out of the school. I immediately jump into my

of the parking lot.

This couldn’t be happening. Please

think back. Try to do the math, but my mind is so jumbled that I cannot

will probably be

Carol was wrong.

car and rush