Ex-Husband's Regret

A surprise
It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

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+15 BONUS

can answer that question or think too deeply about

saying

I rush to the teacher’s lounge. I just want to breathe a little before I have to go to my next class Luckily, no one stops me in the hallway. I wasn’t really in the mood to

to anyone

freeze up. I was expecting it to

release a groan as I walk

as I sit down. Nora’s name flashes. I’ve ignored their calls not

Especially given their relationship with Ethan

accept button instead

Ava?” she

anything. Just release the breath I was

don’t shut me out. Don’t shut me and your father out”

catching at

still don’t say anything. I couldn’t even if I wanted to. My mouth

fucking word.

Ava and I want to be in your

please don’t makeme lose another. Losing you again just after finding you would kill

breaks my heart.

my eyes. Damn it. I’ve been

time” I tell her slowly. Trying to

you time if that’s what you need, but always remember

carried you in my heart even when I thought you

know that I’ll always be here for you if you

wanted, but I don’t know if I

I reply

I just don’t know. What if she’s just looking for someone to hang on

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+15 BONUS

of. Of being used. Of being a second choice just like I was

Rowan.

that towards them.

pieces of my heart.

girl” Carol says walking towards

I groan under

was a junior highschool teacher and she had a way

her nose in other

“With the way you’ve been eating and how

preggo” she finishes with a

she was joking, but I freeze in my seat. Her words ring in my mind

every fiber of

okay, Ava? You have to know that I was

right?”

up as panic starts coursing through my body. Rushing out of the lounge, I blindly ran through the hallway till I

of the parking lot.

be happening. Please don’t let it

to do the math, but my mind is so jumbled that

caring that I will probably be

Carol was wrong.

and rush out. Unluckily for me,