Ex-Husband's Regret

A surprise
It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

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+15 BONUS

that question or think too deeply about it, the bell

of my class without saying a single word to my

I just want to breathe a little before I have to go to my next class Luckily, no one stops me in the hallway. I

to anyone

to the teacher lounge and freeze up. I was

I release a groan as I walk to

I sit down. Nora’s name flashes. I’ve ignored

given their relationship with Ethan I go to hang

accept button instead

Ava?” she calls

say anything. Just release the

me out. Don’t shut me and your

at

even if I wanted to. My mouth refuses to move.

fucking word.

daughter, Ava and I want to be in your life. I want to be the mother I was supposed

I want to be there for you. I already lost one child, please don’t makeme lose another. Losing you again

breaks my heart.

my eyes. Damn it. I’ve been so emotional these

her slowly. Trying to

if that’s what you

even when I thought you had died. I

always be here for you

I don’t know if I can trust them yet. Only time will

I reply before

saying, but I just don’t know. What if she’s

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+15 BONUS

being used. Of being a second choice just like I

Rowan.

anything like that towards them. I was just

pieces of my heart.

girl” Carol says walking

groan under

a way of annoying the hell out of

her nose

me in shock. “With the way you’ve been eating

would think you’re preggo”

but I freeze in my seat. Her words

fear through every fiber of my

and frowns. “Are you okay, Ava? You have to know that I

right?”

Rushing out of the lounge, I blindly ran through the hallway till I am out of the school. I

of the parking lot.

This couldn’t be happening. Please don’t let

think back. Try to do the math, but my mind

fast, not caring that I will probably be pulled for over speeding. I needed to

Carol was wrong.

I park my car and rush out. Unluckily for me, I