Ex-Husband's Regret

A surprise
It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

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+15 BONUS

think too deeply about it, the bell rings Taking

out of my class without saying

to the teacher’s lounge. I just want to breathe a little before I have to

to anyone

I was expecting it to be at least somewhat

packed. I release a groan as

as I sit down. Nora’s name flashes. I’ve

Ethan I go to hang up, but I press

accept button instead

Ava?” she calls

Just release the breath

my dear, please don’t shut me out. Don’t shut me and your

catching at the

wanted to. My mouth refuses to move. To utter

fucking word.

my daughter, Ava and I want to be in your life. I

want to be there for you. I already lost one child, please don’t

breaks my heart.

Damn it. I’ve been so emotional these past

I tell her slowly. Trying to

if that’s

my heart even when I thought you had

always be here

so good to be wanted, but I don’t know if I can trust them yet. Only time will

reply before

what she’s saying, but I just don’t know. What if she’s just

2/4

+15 BONUS

gap. That’s what I’m afraid of. Of being used. Of being a second choice just

Rowan.

towards them. I was just trying

pieces of my heart.

Carol says walking towards my

I groan under my

was a junior highschool teacher and she had a way of annoying the hell out of

her

me in shock. “With the way you’ve been

one would think you’re preggo” she finishes with a laugh.

I freeze in my seat. Her words ring in my mind

fear through every

frowns. “Are you okay, Ava? You have to know that I was

right?”

ran through the hallway till I am out of the school. I immediately jump into my car and

of the parking lot.

This couldn’t be happening. Please don’t

to think back. Try to do the math, but my mind is so

fast, not caring that I will probably be pulled for over speeding. I

Carol was wrong.

the store, I park my car and rush out. Unluckily for me, I bump into