Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 59

A surprise
It’s been a month since the whole thing with Ethan happened. Am I okay? Definitely not. Does it

still hurt? Fuck yes. Have I moved on? Absolutely not.

Things haven’t been easy. Every day I find myself drowning further and further in a sea of pain and heartache. I thought I was doing okay when I decided to move on with Ethan. I realize now

that I was probably just lying to myself.

Ethan’s betrayal has drenched up all the other pains I tried burying. All the hurts I tried

forgetting. It was like I was now back to square one. Only thing is that I had a few more new scars

marring my heart and soul.

I go through the days in a fog. Just living numbly. Time and things pass me by because I wasn’t

really living. I am just surviving. Taking each day one at a time.

Everyone seems to have moved on, but I feel like I am just stuck. Stuck in a never ending cycle of

pain and heartbreak. My world right now is dark and cold and I feel all alone.

“Miss Sharp, are you okay?” Mark, one of my students asks me.

Fuck, I hate that name. It serves as a reminded that the people who gave it to me broke me. I

wanted to change it, but I didn’t know which name to take. I didn’t want to take the Howell’s name

given I don’t know that much about them. There is also the fact that I haven’t spoken to them

since that day at my house.

“Yes, I am…focus on the classwork” I reply to him before looking down at the books on my desk.

I loved teaching, but nowadays it has become like a chore. Every day I come to work, I can’t help

but wish the hours would fly by quickly so that I can go home. I wanted solitude but I wasn’t

getting enough of that with Letty and Rowan checking up on me every damn time.

My students have noticed something is wrong. Classes aren’t as fun as they used to be. I wasn’t as

cheery as I was before. I was like a robot. Lifeless. Because of this some of my students have

started skipping class. I just don’t know how to bring back the old Ava.

‘Instead of trying to bring the old you, why don’t you try to create a new version?‘ an internal voice

asks.

Was that even possible? Creating a new version. A version of me that is different from the child,

teen then woman who has been broken too many times to count.

1/4

+15 BONUS

or think too deeply about it, the bell rings Taking

class without saying a single word to

my head down as I rush to the teacher’s lounge. I just want to breathe a little before I have to go to

to anyone

get to the teacher lounge and freeze up. I was

groan as I walk

just as I sit down. Nora’s name flashes. I’ve ignored their calls

with Ethan I go to hang up, but

accept button instead

she calls

Just release the breath I

shut me out. Don’t shut me

at

wanted to.

fucking word.

your life. I want to be

lost one child, please don’t makeme lose another. Losing you again just after finding you would kill me” she pleads, crying and

breaks my heart.

it. I’ve been so emotional these

time” I tell her slowly. Trying to push back

a breath. “I’ll give you time if that’s what you need,

carried you in my heart even when I thought you had died. I hope you can

be here for you if you need

wanted, but I don’t know if I can trust them

reply before

just don’t know. What

2/4

+15 BONUS

Of being used. Of being a second choice

Rowan.

or anything like that towards them. I was just trying to protect

pieces of my heart.

says walking

groan

had a way of annoying the hell out of

likes to stick her nose

food” she looks at me in shock. “With the way

think you’re preggo” she finishes with

was joking, but I freeze in my seat. Her words ring in my mind like a broken

through every

frowns. “Are you okay, Ava? You have to

right?”

out of the lounge, I blindly ran through the hallway till I am

of the parking lot.

This couldn’t be happening. Please don’t let

math, but my mind is so jumbled that

fast, not caring that I will probably be

Carol was wrong.

my car and rush out.

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