Ex-Husband's Regret

Chapter 60

“What are you doing here?” I ask through my sobs.

He comes and kneels before me, his eyes staring at me with an emotion I can’t figure out.

“Emma told me she saw you at the store. She said you looked hysterical and that you bought a bunch of pregnancy tests before leaving” he tells me softly, his fingers wiping away my tears.

Damn it Emma and her big mouth! What the hell did she think she’ll accomplish by telling Rowan that I bought pregnancy tests?

“She shouldn’t have told you. It’s none of her business neither is it yours” I hiss.

He doesn’t react instead he asks. “Have you taken the test?”

I just nod my head as more tears fill my eyes.

“And?”

I don’t answer him. I just couldn’t bring myself to admit what the test informed me.

When I don’t answer he surveys the room. His eyes land on them laying near the sink. He stands up and goes to check them. I should be fucking angry that he was violating my privacy, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. Not when I had much more important things to worry about.

He comes back and this time instead of kneeling before me. He instead sits next to me.

“Congratulation. You’re going to be a great mother” he tell me an odd catch in his voice.

I lay my head on his shoulder as I speak. “Am I? You didn’t ever want to have another baby with me even though I wanted one desperately. I thought it’s because you thought I was a bad mother”

I was always so insecure when it came to Rowan. I knew the real reason. He didn’t want another baby because he was holding out hope that Emma will come back. I lied to myself because it was better to think he thought I wasn’t a good mother than to acknowledge that he just didn’t want a

baby with me.

“I’ve never thought you’re a bad mother, Ava. You’re the fucking best. One just has to look at the relationship between you and Noah to know it’s true” he pauses. “Can I tell you something?”

I nod my head.

“I was always jealous of the bond you have with Noah. I still am” he confesses. I lift my head in

shock.

2

“Really”

+15 BONUS

I still can’t believe that Rowan was right now sitting on the bathroom floor with me. The Rowan i

know wouldn’t have cared at all, let alone wipe away my tears.

“Yeah” he answers

We stay in silence after that. I soon start feeling drowsy. I don’t know when I slept or how he carried me to my bed. The last thing I felt before falling into deep sleep, was his lips on my

forehead.

When I wake up, it’s midafternoon the next day. I find breakfast on my side table. Which was

probably cold.

I get out of bed and make an appointment with my gynecologist. I take a quick shower then get

I still felt tired and worn

didn’t know who brought it, but my guess is

Rowan.

drive as slowly as I can. Trying to delay getting to the doctor’s office. I get there after almost

the private clinic.

are women inside with their husbands. It takes me back to when I

appointments.

when I was giving birth, given he showed little

was expecting.

and take a seat,

called.

Sharp” I’m finally called after about

stand up and walk to Dr. Raven’s

to see you, Ava. So what can I do for you this fine afternoon?” she asks as she takes a

hoping to get an ultrasound. I took a pregnancy test

just wanted a confirmation”

wring my hands. Completely nervous and nearing

316

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the bed, while I set up things?” she asks kindly

nod

and stare at the ceiling. I tried calming my

up your

my hands shaking. She squirts the gel on my stomach and begins

wand around.

along.” she says

beating heart fills

tears and grip the hem of my

but I wasn’t.

blur. She cleans me up and gives

vitamins. I leave her office and pass by her secretary’s desk. She gives me a date

me the images

like the hell

Hope that the

it will be the same for my

here I am. Driving, with the real proof

backseat.

where I am, until

the cliff.

didn’t want him or her. I didn’t want a

and lies. A baby with the same man that tried his

can I look at him or her and not feel any type of resentment? I wanted to forget my

she will be a reminder of how his or her

betrayed me.

a step forward. Just one step and everything

heartache. I would be free of the

drowning me.

4/6

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I don’t turn. I still don’t turn

the hell do you think you’re doing, Ava?” Rowan’s voice growls

tur“, even as the wind picks up I feel its force. As if it was also urging me

step

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