Ex-Husband's Regret

Calvin.

"What the fuck are you doing at my house, Emma" I say through gritted teeth.

Gunner and I were busy repainting his room, before the doorbell rang. The last thing I wanted was for him to hear me shouting and come down only to see this bitch.

I glare at her as I feel my anger rise within me. My fists are clenched, and my jaw is clamped tightly in an effort to stop me from blowing up.

"I-I" she doesn't finish the sentence, and it just pisses me off even more.

Fuck this! I get out of the house and close the door behind me. I needed to get rid of her.

"I asked you a fucking question, Emma!" I snap, gripping the door handle like a vise, just to center myself.

After all the shit she's put me and Gunner through, she now has the audacity to show up on my doorstep?

The pain and heartache of over almost a decade. Did she really think that I would easily forget it? That I'd put it behind me and pretend like she didn't reap my heart out over and over again. Pretend that she didn't put my soul through a fucking mincer and shredded me to pieces?

It fucking hurts. It still fucking hurts even now. The pain is constantly there. The scars aren't fucking healed and I doubt they'll ever will.

"Please, I just want to see him. I want to see Gunner?" she pleads, tears filling her eyes, but seeing them does nothing.

and guilt in her eyes. She doesn't try to hide her emotions but they still don't move me. I

across my chest. "Weren't you the one that was insistent on not having anything to do with

her lips start trembling and her face twists as if she was in physical

"He's my son"

but an egg donor. It's unfortunate that Gunner had to have you as a mother to be honest. If you want to see the true meaning of being a mom, then look at Ava.

her eyes and she stumbles back as if I've hit

you'll ever be. With all your beauty and brains, what did it get you? Always feeling like you're better than her, but in real sense you aren't even fucking close. You were a nasty bitch to her and look at her now. She has the man you've always wanted, a

and bring her to her knees. She's always hated Ava. Always hated being compared to her, so I knew this would destroy her. Call me cruel, but seeing her in pain eases something inside me. After the shit she put me through, she deserves

couldn't hide my self-loathing. She isn't wholly to blame. I take some of the

yet she never felt anything for me. I stayed with her and tolerated her treatment because I'd hoped that one day she'd come to love me. That she'd see just how good we were together and that she didn't need Rowan's love. Not when

self-centered she was. She cared about nobody but herself and that stupid love she held on to for a

and I had enough, my love turned sour. I hated her. Loathed her with everything that I am. At Right though. When my son is asleep and I'm lying alone in my huge bed,

the power to treat me as

begging pulls me back

nothing like the woman I remembered. Her light was gone,

hand away when she tries to touch me. "You think you can regain what you lost now that the man you've held on to for so long doesn't want you? You have to

just want to make amends,

too late for your fucking apologies"