Love Aint Always Pretty

Saudade

- the feeling of longing for something or someone who you love which is lost

Origin: Portuguese

19

NICK'S POV

EIGHT YEARS AGO

"Is this how you do it?" I asked.

Catherine looks over at me while I was chopping the spices she needs for the spicy spaghetti she's teaching me. She laughs and stands behind my back as she pressed her front on me.

"Love, that's too small..." she giggles.

"Is it?" I pulled my head up to her.

"But don't worry. It'll work out just fine later I guess." She leans over and kissed my cheeks while her blond hair falls to my left shoulder.

I smile at her.

She keeps kissing my cheek while her arms were holding around my chest. Her breasts pressed against my back. Catherine was teaching me how to cook and even though I hate cooking, she forced me to and since I love her so much, I allowed myself to learn. At least if we'll go to college, I'm ready to make meals for her if she comes home late.

Catherine walks back to the burner with the chopping board on her hand and started placing the chopped spices into the mixed paste. I stood right next to her and just love the view of her while she is wiping her sweat over her forehead. She told me to check the pasta so I checked the pasta. She told me to whisked the sauce so I whisked the sauce. The aroma filled the entire house and I'm sure as hell that our dinner will be delicious.

The entire house was ours tonight since mom and Tracy went out of town with Danny and I really wanted to stay behind cos of Catherine. I helped Catherine prepare the table and we had such a scrumptious dinner. We talked a lot about our plans for college and then we washed the dishes together.

We lounged on the couch while the tv was the only thing lighting the entire living room. She was resting her head on my shoulder while we were both watching this romantic movie that she picked for us to watch. Even though I don't like the movie, I have no choice but to watch it cos I love Catherine.

I want Catherine to be happy. I want Catherine to smile. I want Catherine to be pleased. I want Catherine and only her.

"Have you talked to your parents on transferring to high school here?" I ask.

"I'm still talking to them about it."

I sigh. "Maybe it's not a good plan to let you transfer. Your parents will be suspicious about transferring all of a sudden to my school."

I feel her twirling her finger over my chest. "But I don't want to wait for almost two more years to see you."

She pulls her head up to me and I bent down a little to kiss her forehead. It's been three weeks since the first time I kissed her at the lake and after that we kiss a lot than usual.

"Catherine you don't have to worry about me. Two years will be fast and we'll be together in college then." I said.

"But women will be all over you while I'm away." She pouts.

"They'll never be as good as you." I push her hair behind her ear.

She hugs me all of a sudden and I just rub her back. This was hard for us cos I'm sure her parents won't allow her to transfer to a cheap ass school and I'm sure they'll find out about us soon. I'm scared of that day to happen cos I am most definitely sure they'll tear us apart.

to persuade them." She

"Catherine you don't really--"

much and I don't want

smiled at

out and she glances at it but

was wondering.... have you ever had sex

getting carried away by

chuckles. "I'm just

now that I think about it, I wish I waited longer so I could've given you my

She smiles.

mean that. I didn't just say it to impress her. But I really wished I did wait for

still a virgin, babe?" I

guard. I love it when she's embarrassed in front of me every time we

you okay about that?" She asks.

course. I love you Catherine. I will accept you with all you are."

we just kissed with tongue until I feel her leaning back down to the couch and I was going down with her. I know where

this now?" I

I want

her clothes. She stands on her feet while she was only left with her underwear. I pulled off my pants from me leaving my boxers on. She sits on top of

it off her leg, kissing her ribs then she lands her lips on mine.

have sex, I want to

kept kissing her lips caressing her body and slowly inserting

•••••

love." I hear

tray of foods that she obviously made for me. I'm quickly sat on the bed and rubbed my eyes while she placed the tray on top

and kissed my lips. "Good

Pancakes with honey, no butter cos you don't like butter

only liked orange juice cos that was what we

She giggles.

You know what's best for me." I said

cos we cuddled and teased each other a little bit. Since Catherine brought some clothes with her, it felt like we were

know mom and Tracy will be

I ask her while I was upstairs preparing myself.

I hear her.

were planning on driving around town later to buy some ingredients for the

door love?" I ask while

I hear yelling.

but my loose shirt on her. Shit. Catherine told him that she was staying over a female friend's house

man? This poor man living

and tried to explain to him. I

hurting Catherine." I said as I see her arm getting red from all the

daughter! I know what I'm doing! I know

Catherine is crying.

Catherine is hurt.

tears won't