Love Aint Always Pretty

Saudade

- the feeling of longing for something or someone who you love which is lost

Origin: Portuguese

19

NICK'S POV

EIGHT YEARS AGO

"Is this how you do it?" I asked.

Catherine looks over at me while I was chopping the spices she needs for the spicy spaghetti she's teaching me. She laughs and stands behind my back as she pressed her front on me.

"Love, that's too small..." she giggles.

"Is it?" I pulled my head up to her.

"But don't worry. It'll work out just fine later I guess." She leans over and kissed my cheeks while her blond hair falls to my left shoulder.

I smile at her.

She keeps kissing my cheek while her arms were holding around my chest. Her breasts pressed against my back. Catherine was teaching me how to cook and even though I hate cooking, she forced me to and since I love her so much, I allowed myself to learn. At least if we'll go to college, I'm ready to make meals for her if she comes home late.

Catherine walks back to the burner with the chopping board on her hand and started placing the chopped spices into the mixed paste. I stood right next to her and just love the view of her while she is wiping her sweat over her forehead. She told me to check the pasta so I checked the pasta. She told me to whisked the sauce so I whisked the sauce. The aroma filled the entire house and I'm sure as hell that our dinner will be delicious.

The entire house was ours tonight since mom and Tracy went out of town with Danny and I really wanted to stay behind cos of Catherine. I helped Catherine prepare the table and we had such a scrumptious dinner. We talked a lot about our plans for college and then we washed the dishes together.

We lounged on the couch while the tv was the only thing lighting the entire living room. She was resting her head on my shoulder while we were both watching this romantic movie that she picked for us to watch. Even though I don't like the movie, I have no choice but to watch it cos I love Catherine.

I want Catherine to be happy. I want Catherine to smile. I want Catherine to be pleased. I want Catherine and only her.

"Have you talked to your parents on transferring to high school here?" I ask.

"I'm still talking to them about it."

I sigh. "Maybe it's not a good plan to let you transfer. Your parents will be suspicious about transferring all of a sudden to my school."

I feel her twirling her finger over my chest. "But I don't want to wait for almost two more years to see you."

She pulls her head up to me and I bent down a little to kiss her forehead. It's been three weeks since the first time I kissed her at the lake and after that we kiss a lot than usual.

"Catherine you don't have to worry about me. Two years will be fast and we'll be together in college then." I said.

"But women will be all over you while I'm away." She pouts.

"They'll never be as good as you." I push her hair behind her ear.

She hugs me all of a sudden and I just rub her back. This was hard for us cos I'm sure her parents won't allow her to transfer to a cheap ass school and I'm sure they'll find out about us soon. I'm scared of that day to happen cos I am most definitely sure they'll tear us apart.

persuade them." She says.

"Catherine you don't really--"

you Nick. I love you so much and I don't want to be away from you. Where you are is where I

at

and she glances at it but

have you ever had sex before?"

"Why? You're getting

"I'm just

kissed her lips quickly. "Yeah. But now that I think about it, I wish I

She smiles.

but I mean that. I didn't just say it to impress her. But I

a virgin, babe?"

pulling it away from her. I love how Catherine's cheeks turns red when she's shy or caught off guard. I love it when she's embarrassed

you okay about

will accept you with all you

just kissed with tongue until I feel her leaning back down to the couch and I was going down

want this now?" I

want you.

I hurriedly help her take off her clothes. She stands on her feet while she was only left with her underwear. I pulled off my pants from me leaving my boxers on. She sits on top of my lap as I unclasp her bra, I threw it to the floor and starts sucking and licking her nipples. She pulls her head back and

pulled down her panty sliding it off her leg, kissing her ribs then she lands

first time to have sex, I want to be on top

her lips caressing her body and slowly inserting myself inside of her.

•••••

I hear

open my eyes only to find my beautiful girlfriend wearing nothing but my shirt on with a tray of foods that she obviously made for me. I'm quickly sat on the bed and rubbed my

forward to me and kissed

no butter cos you don't like butter and you're newly favorite orange juice." She

her again. "I only liked orange juice cos that

She giggles.

You know what's best for me." I said as I leaned over her again

shower cos we cuddled and teased each other a little bit. Since Catherine brought some clothes with her, it felt like we were

know mom and Tracy will be back sooner

it love?" I ask her

hear

around town later to buy some ingredients for the

ask while I stumble

I hear yelling.

He looked furious and mad seeing his own daughter inside the house of a man wearing nothing but my loose shirt on her. Shit. Catherine told him that she was staying over a female friend's house but this totally ruined everything that we planned for. My heart quickly accelerated and I see

been busy with this man? This poor man

out of the door and tried to explain to him. I just

I see her arm getting red

daughter! I know what I'm doing! I know what's

Catherine is crying.

Catherine is hurt.

won't stop falling.