Love Aint Always Pretty

Lítost

- regret and remorse and repentance; a state of agony and torment; or sorrow said to be "created by the sudden sight of one's own misery"

Origin: Czech

49

I just glued my eyes at his name while it was appearing on my screen. I didn't answer his call. I couldn't answer his call. I don't want to answer his call then it went off. My heart feels heavy.

Why on earth is he still calling? Will he want to ask about what he saw? Will he ask about my kiss with Aries? Why would he act like he care when he knows he shouldn't act this way?

My phone rings again.

Nick calling...

I answer it.

He exhales. "Where did you go?"

I walked out of the elevator and walked to my dorm. I entered the room and I still didn't answer Nick. He's waiting for my answer too. Tracy wasn't around, I'm sure she's with Clyde. I leaned my back against the door and I feel my heart beating faster.

"Where in hell did you go with Aries, Savannah?" He asked again. He sounds mad at me.

I exhale. "Why do you act like you're concerned about where I went to with Aries? I can go anywhere with any guy I want Nick. I don't need your permission."

I hang up.

My phone rings again.

Damn it Nick!

Nick calling...

I rejected his call but then my phone rings once again just in a split second.

Nick calling...

I answered it. "What do you want from me? I need to sleep Nick!"

"Open your goddamn door Savannah."

My brows creasing.

"Open your fucking door!" He demands while there was a slam on my door that made me flinch.

I exhale. He's outside.

I turned to face the door and took a deep breath in before I opened it. He's here. He's really right outside my room. I hang up on him and he barged his way inside.

"Didn't you leave already?" I asked as my eyebrow arching.

"I came back. I need to talk to you about what I saw." He says.

I looked away. He really saw it. He really saw me kissing Aries. Good. He saw it. I wanted Nick to see it too, cos it'll make me realize if he actually cared or not. If it actually make him jealous or not.

"Where did you go with him?" He asks. Sounded as if he's demanding an answer from me.

My head moves back to Nick and he's looking at me angrily as if I did something really unforgivable. His eyes are piercing into me and he's actually mad. I know he is. It wasn't the same face he had when he saw me with Dustin. His brows are furrowing and his jaw is clenched.

"Answer me." He says.

"I don't have to explain anything to you. You don't have the right to know where I went to with Aries." I defended myself.

So you mean to say I can also fuck

"Go. Be free. Fuck a lot of women as

I can't do that cos I only want you."

melting. Don't give in Savannah. You're stronger

with another man. You're jealous when you see me with someone else. You get jealous but you don't admit it to yourself!"

maybe I am! Maybe I am jealous cos you kissed Aries! Now

know Nick. You and

He laughs humorlessly.

you go fuck?" He asked

My eyes widened.

Was he better when he ate you? Was he

brimming out from my eyes and it falls down on my cheeks. His face looking over to another

I could go

eyes are rueful. His eyes looked angry a while ago and now they look soft. He licks his lips and looks confused as hell. I

not be in a relationship and we may not have a label, but Nick I've never had sex with another man aside from you! How can

and it's too much already. I always say it's too much but right now it is ready too much that I can't

but I pull myself away from him. "Don't you

just came out. I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I'm really

say as I

"Savannah please."

fuck out!" I yelled at

I've never imagined he could tell me that. I never imagined

standing by the doorway. Nick was shocked too. We didn't notice the door opening. We didn't notice that someone came in. She looked at us confused and troubled. I wonder how long she has been standing there. I wonder what were the things she

You two..." Tracy seemed surprised like

she

been fucking each other around behind our backs? Behind me?! Savannah I thought you trust me?! Why didn't you even tell me anything about this?!" Tracy's voice raising

"I'm sorry." I say.

away from Nick cos he'll only hurt you. But you didn't listen. Now

I closed my eyes.

answer that

least going to court her Nick?"

"No." Nick answers.

answered so quickly. Still no hesitation

I sigh.

as Aries. You use women. I never thought you

escaping from my eyes like

"You're just fucking her? Just

Tracy. Yes. This is all he could

together. God Nick are you really going to keep on treating

It's okay." I

friend now. I can't let him do this to you! You're an innocent girl. You're too innocent for him.

Tracy." I cut her off and my tears are still falling and

lip parted in

use me as much as he wants to and as

if she's asking him that he knows about how I feel and his stares seemed to answer her question. Tracy shakes her head. I feel so

that he's using you for his own pleasure. You should be stopping this.

head and cried cos it's

day will come when he'll get tired of you, what's

don't

ruined her Tracy."

Nick. She's only eighteen and you're twenty four

we did something wrong. If I fuck Savannah as much as I want to, it's our choice. She's letting me do it anyways. I didn't even stop you from getting into a relationship with Clyde and you know I don't like him for you but you still said yes to him. So don't get involve with our shit. It's not your goddamn

me. I don't want to hear those

sex life. It's not yours. It's ours! We can

will hurt her Nick. You will give her false hope and women will always fall first as you see now. You will not only ruin her but you'll emotionally hurt

I'm sobbing.

I'm crying.