Love Aint Always Pretty

Lítost

- regret and remorse and repentance; a state of agony and torment; or sorrow said to be "created by the sudden sight of one's own misery"

Origin: Czech

49

I just glued my eyes at his name while it was appearing on my screen. I didn't answer his call. I couldn't answer his call. I don't want to answer his call then it went off. My heart feels heavy.

Why on earth is he still calling? Will he want to ask about what he saw? Will he ask about my kiss with Aries? Why would he act like he care when he knows he shouldn't act this way?

My phone rings again.

Nick calling...

I answer it.

He exhales. "Where did you go?"

I walked out of the elevator and walked to my dorm. I entered the room and I still didn't answer Nick. He's waiting for my answer too. Tracy wasn't around, I'm sure she's with Clyde. I leaned my back against the door and I feel my heart beating faster.

"Where in hell did you go with Aries, Savannah?" He asked again. He sounds mad at me.

I exhale. "Why do you act like you're concerned about where I went to with Aries? I can go anywhere with any guy I want Nick. I don't need your permission."

I hang up.

My phone rings again.

Damn it Nick!

Nick calling...

I rejected his call but then my phone rings once again just in a split second.

Nick calling...

I answered it. "What do you want from me? I need to sleep Nick!"

"Open your goddamn door Savannah."

My brows creasing.

"Open your fucking door!" He demands while there was a slam on my door that made me flinch.

I exhale. He's outside.

I turned to face the door and took a deep breath in before I opened it. He's here. He's really right outside my room. I hang up on him and he barged his way inside.

"Didn't you leave already?" I asked as my eyebrow arching.

"I came back. I need to talk to you about what I saw." He says.

I looked away. He really saw it. He really saw me kissing Aries. Good. He saw it. I wanted Nick to see it too, cos it'll make me realize if he actually cared or not. If it actually make him jealous or not.

"Where did you go with him?" He asks. Sounded as if he's demanding an answer from me.

My head moves back to Nick and he's looking at me angrily as if I did something really unforgivable. His eyes are piercing into me and he's actually mad. I know he is. It wasn't the same face he had when he saw me with Dustin. His brows are furrowing and his jaw is clenched.

"Answer me." He says.

"I don't have to explain anything to you. You don't have the right to know where I went to with Aries." I defended myself.

to say I can also fuck any

my arms together against my breasts. "Go. Be free. Fuck a lot of

can't do that cos I only want

melting. Don't give in Savannah. You're stronger than

just admit to yourself that you're fucking jealous?! You get freaking jealous when I'm with another man. You're jealous when you see me with someone else. You get jealous but you don't admit it

you kissed Aries! Now where did you go?!"

Nick. You and I are not in

He laughs humorlessly.

you go fuck?"

My eyes widened.

he ate you? Was he bigger than I

brimming

woman?! You think I could go around sleep with

He licks

a label, but Nick I've never had sex with another man aside from you! How can you think of me that

He's hurting me and it's too much already. I always say it's too much but right now it is ready too

myself away from him. "Don't you dare think about touching me."

sorry.

say as I

"Savannah please."

fuck out!" I yelled

I'm hurt. I've never imagined he could tell me that. I never imagined he could say that

door opening. We didn't notice that someone

did... You two..." Tracy seemed surprised like

know she

have been fucking each other around behind our backs? Behind me?! Savannah I thought

"I'm sorry." I say.

I told you to stay away from Nick cos he'll only hurt you. But you didn't listen. Now how long has this thing been going on?" Tracy

I closed my eyes.

that Savannah." Nick

to court her Nick?"

"No." Nick answers.

quickly. Still no hesitation

I sigh.

same as Aries. You use women. I never thought you could do

escaping from my

just

Yes. This is all he could give

me. I felt so stupid now after all those times we were together. God Nick are you really going to keep on treating Savannah this

It's

brother. You're my roommate. You're a close friend now. I can't let him do this to you! You're an innocent girl. You're too innocent for him. It's like he's treating you garbage

her off

lip parted

me as much as he wants to and as long as he needs me cos I love

she's asking him that he knows about how I feel and his stares seemed to answer her question. Tracy shakes her head. I feel so low of myself. I tell myself I don't deserve

mad that he's using you for his own pleasure. You should be stopping this. You shouldn't agree to this kind of thing you

head and cried

day will come when he'll get tired of you,

sigh. "I don't know." I answer

ruined her

should've known better Nick. She's only eighteen and you're

if we did something wrong. If I fuck Savannah as much as I want to, it's our choice. She's letting me do it anyways. I didn't even stop you from getting into a relationship with Clyde and you know I don't like him for you but you still said yes to him. So don't get involve with our

covering my face with my hands. I'm so embarrassed. I don't want them to fight because of me. I don't want to hear those words coming from their

not yours. It's ours! We can do what we want cos

and women will always fall first as you see now. You will not only ruin her

I'm sobbing.

I'm crying.