Love Aint Always Pretty

Lítost

- regret and remorse and repentance; a state of agony and torment; or sorrow said to be "created by the sudden sight of one's own misery"

Origin: Czech

49

I just glued my eyes at his name while it was appearing on my screen. I didn't answer his call. I couldn't answer his call. I don't want to answer his call then it went off. My heart feels heavy.

Why on earth is he still calling? Will he want to ask about what he saw? Will he ask about my kiss with Aries? Why would he act like he care when he knows he shouldn't act this way?

My phone rings again.

Nick calling...

I answer it.

He exhales. "Where did you go?"

I walked out of the elevator and walked to my dorm. I entered the room and I still didn't answer Nick. He's waiting for my answer too. Tracy wasn't around, I'm sure she's with Clyde. I leaned my back against the door and I feel my heart beating faster.

"Where in hell did you go with Aries, Savannah?" He asked again. He sounds mad at me.

I exhale. "Why do you act like you're concerned about where I went to with Aries? I can go anywhere with any guy I want Nick. I don't need your permission."

I hang up.

My phone rings again.

Damn it Nick!

Nick calling...

I rejected his call but then my phone rings once again just in a split second.

Nick calling...

I answered it. "What do you want from me? I need to sleep Nick!"

"Open your goddamn door Savannah."

My brows creasing.

"Open your fucking door!" He demands while there was a slam on my door that made me flinch.

I exhale. He's outside.

I turned to face the door and took a deep breath in before I opened it. He's here. He's really right outside my room. I hang up on him and he barged his way inside.

"Didn't you leave already?" I asked as my eyebrow arching.

"I came back. I need to talk to you about what I saw." He says.

I looked away. He really saw it. He really saw me kissing Aries. Good. He saw it. I wanted Nick to see it too, cos it'll make me realize if he actually cared or not. If it actually make him jealous or not.

"Where did you go with him?" He asks. Sounded as if he's demanding an answer from me.

My head moves back to Nick and he's looking at me angrily as if I did something really unforgivable. His eyes are piercing into me and he's actually mad. I know he is. It wasn't the same face he had when he saw me with Dustin. His brows are furrowing and his jaw is clenched.

"Answer me." He says.

"I don't have to explain anything to you. You don't have the right to know where I went to with Aries." I defended myself.

fuck

my arms together against my breasts. "Go. Be free. Fuck a lot of women as much

know I can't do that cos I

Don't give

I'm with another man. You're jealous when

cos you

right to know Nick. You and I are

He laughs humorlessly.

go fuck?" He asked

My eyes widened.

he better when he ate you? Was he bigger than I am? Did he

and palm landed on his cheek. I slapped Nick. I slapped him hard. My tears are brimming out from my eyes and

of woman?! You think I

angry a while ago and now they look soft. He licks his lips and

I've never had sex with another man

my heart. He's hurting me and it's too much already. I always say it's too much but right now it is ready too much that I

myself away from him. "Don't you

I'm sorry. I didn't mean that.

I say as I

"Savannah please."

the fuck out!" I yelled

hurt. I've never imagined he could tell me that. I never imagined he could say that to me so straight into my

dropped when I saw Tracy standing by the doorway. Nick was shocked too. We didn't notice the door opening. We didn't notice that someone came in. She

did... You two..." Tracy

she couldn't believe the

each other around behind our backs? Behind me?! Savannah I thought you trust me?! Why didn't you

"I'm sorry." I say.

it. I told you to stay away from Nick cos he'll only hurt you. But you didn't

I closed my eyes.

that Savannah."

at least going to court her

"No." Nick answers.

quickly. Still no hesitation on

I sigh.

Nick. You're just the same as Aries. You use

from

eyes Nick eagerly. "You're just fucking

Yes. This is all he could

felt so stupid now after all those times we were together. God Nick are you really going to keep on treating Savannah this cheap?

It's

not okay Savannah! Do you hear yourself? He's my brother. You're my roommate. You're a close friend now. I can't let him do this to you! You're an innocent girl. You're too innocent for him. It's like he's treating you

her off and my tears

parted in

as much as he wants to and as long as

as if she's asking him that he knows about how I feel and his stares seemed to answer her question. Tracy shakes her head. I feel so low of myself. I

You should be mad that he's using you for his own pleasure. You should be stopping this. You shouldn't agree to this kind of thing you have with Nick. It'll go nowhere." She asks

shake my head and cried cos

get

"I don't know." I

know I ruined her

better Nick. She's only eighteen and you're twenty four years

to, it's our choice. She's letting me do it anyways. I didn't even stop you from getting into a relationship with Clyde

want them to fight because of me. I don't want to hear those words

Tracy. It's Savannah's sex life. It's not yours.

hope and women will always fall first as you see now. You will not only ruin her but you'll emotionally

I'm sobbing.

I'm crying.