Love Aint Always Pretty

Lítost

- regret and remorse and repentance; a state of agony and torment; or sorrow said to be "created by the sudden sight of one's own misery"

Origin: Czech

49

I just glued my eyes at his name while it was appearing on my screen. I didn't answer his call. I couldn't answer his call. I don't want to answer his call then it went off. My heart feels heavy.

Why on earth is he still calling? Will he want to ask about what he saw? Will he ask about my kiss with Aries? Why would he act like he care when he knows he shouldn't act this way?

My phone rings again.

Nick calling...

I answer it.

He exhales. "Where did you go?"

I walked out of the elevator and walked to my dorm. I entered the room and I still didn't answer Nick. He's waiting for my answer too. Tracy wasn't around, I'm sure she's with Clyde. I leaned my back against the door and I feel my heart beating faster.

"Where in hell did you go with Aries, Savannah?" He asked again. He sounds mad at me.

I exhale. "Why do you act like you're concerned about where I went to with Aries? I can go anywhere with any guy I want Nick. I don't need your permission."

I hang up.

My phone rings again.

Damn it Nick!

Nick calling...

I rejected his call but then my phone rings once again just in a split second.

Nick calling...

I answered it. "What do you want from me? I need to sleep Nick!"

"Open your goddamn door Savannah."

My brows creasing.

"Open your fucking door!" He demands while there was a slam on my door that made me flinch.

I exhale. He's outside.

I turned to face the door and took a deep breath in before I opened it. He's here. He's really right outside my room. I hang up on him and he barged his way inside.

"Didn't you leave already?" I asked as my eyebrow arching.

"I came back. I need to talk to you about what I saw." He says.

I looked away. He really saw it. He really saw me kissing Aries. Good. He saw it. I wanted Nick to see it too, cos it'll make me realize if he actually cared or not. If it actually make him jealous or not.

"Where did you go with him?" He asks. Sounded as if he's demanding an answer from me.

My head moves back to Nick and he's looking at me angrily as if I did something really unforgivable. His eyes are piercing into me and he's actually mad. I know he is. It wasn't the same face he had when he saw me with Dustin. His brows are furrowing and his jaw is clenched.

"Answer me." He says.

"I don't have to explain anything to you. You don't have the right to know where I went to with Aries." I defended myself.

So you mean to say I can also fuck any woman I want

crossed my arms together against my breasts. "Go. Be free. Fuck a lot of women as

cos I only want you." He

give

jealous?! You get freaking jealous when I'm with another man. You're jealous

am! Maybe I am jealous cos you kissed Aries! Now where

have the right to know Nick. You and

He laughs humorlessly.

go fuck?" He

My eyes widened.

he ate you? Was he bigger than I am? Did he make you

Nick. I slapped him hard. My tears are brimming out from my eyes and it

fucking think I'm that kind of woman?! You think I could go around sleep with

a while ago and now they look soft. He licks his lips and looks confused as hell. I think he just realized what he just said to

be in a relationship and we may not have a label, but Nick I've never had sex with another man aside from you! How can you think

much already. I always say it's too much but right now it is ready too much that I can't seem to handle it.

I pull myself away from him. "Don't you dare think about touching me." I

out. I'm sorry.

say

"Savannah please."

out!" I

students were hearing us fight but I wanted him to leave. I'm hurt. I've never imagined he could tell me that. I never imagined he could say that

I saw Tracy standing by the doorway. Nick was shocked too. We didn't notice the door opening. We didn't notice that someone came in. She

did... You two..." Tracy

she couldn't believe the things

around behind our backs? Behind me?! Savannah I thought you trust me?! Why didn't you even tell me anything about this?!"

"I'm sorry." I say.

stay away from Nick cos he'll only hurt you. But you

I closed my eyes.

answer that Savannah." Nick

least going to court her

"No." Nick answers.

Still no hesitation on

I sigh.

just the same as Aries. You use women. I

escaping from my eyes

Nick eagerly. "You're just fucking

This is all he could

Nick are you really going to keep

please. It's okay."

Do you hear yourself? He's my brother. You're my roommate. You're a close friend now. I can't let him do this to you! You're

Tracy." I cut her off and my tears

parted

let him use me as much as he wants to and as long as he needs me cos I

how I feel and his stares seemed to answer her question. Tracy shakes her head. I feel so low of myself.

be mad that he's using you for his own pleasure. You should be stopping this. You shouldn't agree to this

my head and cried cos it's

if that day will come when he'll get tired of you, what's next?" She

"I don't know." I

know I ruined her Tracy."

Nick. She's

I didn't even stop you from getting into a relationship with Clyde and you know I don't like him for you but you still said yes to

embarrassed. I don't want them to fight because of me. I don't want to hear those words coming from their mouths. I feel so embarrassed cos

Savannah's sex life. It's not yours. It's ours! We

Nick. You will give her false hope and women will always fall first as you see now. You will

I'm sobbing.

I'm crying.