Love Aint Always Pretty

Chapter 50: 50 Panimalos

Panimalos

Translation: revenge

Origin: Cebuano

50

"Trace?" I called out to her.

She sits on her bed as she looks back at me. Tracy was busy putting on her ankle boots, getting ready for another night out.

"You haven't talked to me for three days now since that night. I'm really sorry." I say.

She exhales. "I'm not mad at you Savannah. I'm mad at Nick."

I walked to Tracy and sat down right next to her. "You still haven't talked to him?"

"I did. The other day. I'm hurting for you too. When you told me you loved my brother, I just wanted to hold you cos he will only hurt you Savannah. He could never be giving you back that kind of love you feel for him." Tracy tells me.

I sigh.

"But I know that no matter how I tell you to stop with whatever you have with him, you won't listen to me." She added.

I smiled at her ruefully.

"Do you really love him?" She asks.

"Yeah." I answered softly.

Tracy hugs me tight right away as if she knows my pain. As if she had felt this kind of pain before. She rubs my back slowly and I wrapped my arms around her. Tracy was like an older sister to me and she treats me well.

"I love him so much Tracy... that I would do anything for him. I'll sacrifice everything for him even though it already hurts. I'll try to deal with the pain. I'll try to be strong for myself." I cried on her shoulder.

"Oh Savannah. I just couldn't stand seeing you getting hurt over Nick. I told you he's not capable of loving someone new anymore. The best advice I could give you is to give up what you feel for Nick. I'm sorry for being so blunt but I'm your friend. I need to tell it straight to your face that what you have with him will lead to nowhere. Why'd you even allow yourself to get involve?" She asks.

"I thought I could handle it. But it's gotten out of control. And right now I.." I answered.

I sigh heavily.

"I just need him. He makes me feel special." I said weakly.

She pulled herself away from me and wiped my tears. "Come with me. I'm going out and you need to party. At least have fun just for one night."

"Where?"

"The frat house."

I shake my head. "After that night, I haven't talked to Nick. I don't think I'm ready to face him."

"Don't worry. Nick isn't around today. He said he left for the weekend."

My brows creasing. "Where he went to?"

"I don't know. He didn't say."

I exhale. Here I go again, looking for him when he's not around. Here I go again, wondering where he might could've been by now. And here I go again, thinking that he's with Catherine by now, spending his weekend with her.

"So he's not gonna be there?" I asked.

She nods.

"Why are you avoiding Nick?" She asked.

"I don't know. I just feel the need to avoid him cos I thought you were so mad at me." I say.

Tracy smiled. "I'm not. I really wanna help you with Nick cos--"

"Don't. I know he's not gonna fall for me. I couldn't compete with Catherine and for the past eight years she's all he thinks about. I couldn't change that." I say.

She pushes my hair behind my ear.

"When are you gonna stop?" She asks.

"Once I've had enough." I say.

Tracy stands and pulls me up. "Let's stop being so melodramatic and head to the party. Shall we?"

I smile.

we fought that night and I haven't seen him around too. I always worry when I don't see him cos it just means he's with Catherine and I always get mad at myself cos

hear

smiled at

that look huh?" He pulls

I need to party. I

a massive

cos it was what I drank when Nick snatched it from my hand when a guy offered it to me. I squint my eyes and feel my

know what, let's take it easy.

"God I

we

I nod.

I feel Aries' hand holding onto my waist while I was grinding on him. I

I know for myself I should give him up. I just don't know when and how to

for

enjoying. I'm having fun. I'm forgetting a little bit. Though Nick sometimes crosses my mind. The margarita is getting into my system. I'm feeling a little bit free and wild. I sprawled my arms around Aries' shoulders, wrapping it around

so wild

is a side of

cheek. "I

and everyone was getting ready for the spin the bottle. "Let's

at them.

headed to where everyone was. I say down right next to Tracy

to play as

or dare." Penny says to us

playing?"

let me. Nick told him to

grinned. "Okay. I'm

Romeo calls out everyone's attention who'd still want

drink and I accepted it then took a quick drink

"I'll play."

Holy shit no.

pulled my head up when I heard that voice and saw Nick joining us on the couch. Tracy and I stared at each other eagerly in synch. He was sitting down right across

whisper to Tracy who looked shocked

have no idea why he's here. He said he's not

you weren't

Nick didn't answer her.

shall we?"

"How about...." Penny trails.

moved

I Never."

game? I

game. It's gonna be so

don't play with them."

Tracy. Savannah already joined." Penny arched

the couches and

playing."

it's gonna be fun. Don't

"I'm gonna play." I said,

do you play it?" I stared at Nick

moved her

my attention so I turned

me

and if any other person in the circle has done it, they take off a layer of clothing. If you refuse to take off a clothing, you'll kiss someone whoever this empty bottle points

This is childish

bit of a mixture

Tracy told me not to join and Nick was giving

pussy Jamie Sullivan." Penny

at her. "I'm not.

joining then." Nick

cup. I'm nervous as fuck. I've never tried this game. I've never played this game ever in my entire

Alright?"

Everyone cheers and agrees.

a community shower

was some kind

Shit.

Nick is looking at me and I'm looking back. I started taking off my blazer and Nick started taking off his black leather jacket. I glanced

being naked while the others were

had sex this

off my belt alongside with the others. Nick started taking

this week." One man said

shirtless and were left with their boxers on. From the corner of my eye, Nick is starting to pull off his shirt from his head and all the other females were squealing. Ugh, I know he's hot. Stop drooling over what's mine. I stared at Penny, who was already left wearing her red bra and

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