Love Aint Always Pretty

Quatervois

- a crossroad; a critical decision or turning point in one's life.

Origin: French

58

NICK'S POV

SEVEN YEARS AGO

I ran to them and tried to hold Catherine as she groans for pain. I shot her. I'm crying hard and there were more blood. So much blood. Catherine's blood stained her dress as it runs down on my hands.

"Call for help! Call for help!" I yelled at Hans.

Hans stands away and quickly pulled out his phone. I'm shaking. I'm shaking as I hold Catherine on my arms. She smiles weakly as she squints her eyes cos of the pain.

"Catherine.... I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." I repeated the same exact words.

"Shhh... It's not your fault Nick. Don't... Arghh.. Don't blame yourself." Catherine says while grunting.

She wipes my tears. "It's not your fault love."

I shake my head in disagreement.

"I'm sorry." I cried.

"My dad won't let me tell you this... But Nick... Y-you're a father now." She holds my shaking hand then placed it on top of her bump.

"This is your baby." She says.

She smiles while tears were crawling out from her eyes. "Our baby."

My head bent down and more tears were coming out from my eyes. I hate myself. I hate myself for what I did.

"If I don't survive..." Catherine says with such shakiness in her voice.

"Don't say that." I begged.

She smiled weakly. "Please... Please save him Nick. Save our baby. Save him for me Nick." She says while crying.

"Promise me you will." She takes a grip on my hand.

I nod and kissed her forehead as I hold her close to my chest.

I shot Catherine.

I shot Catherine.

I put our baby in critical condition.

"Live for me. Live for me and our baby Catherine. I need you. I need both of you. Please live for me. For us. Please. I'm begging you please stay." I kiss her hand.

She smiles and nods. "I will."

As soon as help came, I went with Hans in the ambulance and both of us neither talked to each other. When we arrived at the hospital, I was still holding Catherine's hand while she fell unconscious. I would always kiss her hand and my tears just won't stop from falling. I'm so scared of what I have done. I don't want to lose her. I don't want to lose out baby.

"Catherine please be okay. Catherine. Catherine you promised me." I cried.

My hands were still shaking while I hold her hands close to my lips. My lips are trembling too. I kissed her knuckles as my tears were streaming down my face. My tears are just unstoppable. Catherine was unconscious now. She went unconscious during the drive. My heart is racing. Fear is gathering inside my body. I'm scared. I'm so scared of losing her. Hans was also crying but he hasn't talked to me during the entire drive to the hospital.

"Sir I'm sorry but you can't come through this door. Sir please step back." The nurse said to me as he pushed me away.

I ran my fingers through my hair and pulled my hair back. I'm so mad at myself. I shot her. I almost put her to death. Oh god please save Catherine and save my son. Please save our son. Suddenly, I see Alec from the corner of my eyes who ran towards me and Hans.

Where's Catherine?" Alec asked

I couldn't answer.

she?" Alec

her!! He fucking shot

groaned as he started hitting me but Alec pulled him away from me while some female patients screamed when they saw it. Nurses and some other hospital staff ran towards us and

off dude!" Alec

father will know about this, you're fucked! If something bad will happen to Catherine, I

away from here for a second. Cmon." Alec

myself too. I let Alec take me somewhere else cos people were looking at me. My clothes are stained with Catherine's dried blood

God damn it Nick look at me!" Alec moved me

eyes moved

fuck Nick?! Did you really

suppose to

of your mind? Didn't you even think you'll end up in jail if you'll do it?!" Alec throws

He killed my mom but he got away with it cos he's filthy rich! He paid the witness to shut up. He paid the police station and the detective to close the case!! How am I not gonna do anything about

shot? You put Catherine in critical condition! What

on my knees, "Catherine said that was my baby, Alec." I cried for more as I covered my face with my

"W-what?"

baby inside her is

down right in

me and I fell into Alec's arms. He rubbed my spine and I just cried. I didn't care how weak I looked

what to do without Catherine, man. I just don't know what to do if... if she's... Oh god." I muffled weakly

scared Alec.

away and looked at me. "Everything's

••••

back to where I left Hans and as soon as I got back, I saw Catherine's family -- her parents and Jenna. They're all crying and looked worried as

be okay?" Jenna asked as tears fall

sister won't leave us." Mrs. Forster says

Forster saw me and moved his head to where I was standing. "You have the guts

them. They looked

sorry."

landed on my face and I almost fell on the floor. Alec catches me but then Mr. Forster grabbed my

that's enough!"

know what you did? Do they know you paid for everyone to keep the case close? Did you even

"You bastard!"

of the room and my heart just feels heavier until he pulls his surgical mask down. Hans was holding Jenna close to him while Mr. & Mrs. Forster were holding onto each other's arm. I'm standing here,

Mrs. Forster asked with

sorry." The doctor

No.

No!

that!" Mr. Forster

god." Mrs. Forster falls onto her

could to revive her but... She's dead on arrival. We are

baby girl. My Catherine."

doctor said that. I killed her. I killed Catherine. I killed the one I love. I killed her. I'm a killer. She

my deep pain. My mind is numb but racing in circles. This isn't making any sense of what was happening. This

daughter." Mrs.

Jenna screams as she cries on

the baby?"

back

my child?" Hans

the guts

stared at the doctor and I don't know if I was ready for what he was gonna

as well." The doctor answered. "We are terribly

and further into the abyss of complete sorrow. Catherine. My baby. My son. We were suppose to be a family. We were

so sorry." I

Before they'll do something to you. The police might be coming here Cmon.

my head sideways. "I killed her Alec. I killed both of them. They died cos of