Mated With Five Boys

"An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind."- Mahatma Gandhi 

I stretched my arms, a yawn escaping my mouth.

I rubbed my eyes tiredly and looked over at the clock, it was 6 o'clock in the morning.

I woke up thirty minutes before my alarm for school usually goes off.

That's a first.

I slipped the warm blankets off my body and immediately felt naked even though I was still wearing the same clothes that I wore yesterday.

I looked down at myself confused, I usually wore pajamas to bed.

I brushed my thoughts away and got out of bed and walked over to the closet, well, let me rephrase that, I tried to walk to my closet.

I took three steps and tripped over a body sleeping on my floor.

What the heck? "Watch where the hell you're going; Axel mumbled tiredly.

"Axel? You better have a damn good reason why you're sleeping on my floor.’ I couldn't help the anger that filled my voice, I still wasn't over everything he said to me.

"Like I could leave you alone in here after what happened."

He said just as angry, sitting up in his pallet on the ground.

Instantly remembering what happened my head snapped to the window that the unidentified man climbed out of last night.

My heart raced all over again, it could have gone so much worse than it did.

So many questioned filled my brain like who was that person? What were they looking for? Or worse, how long have they been sneaking into my room? "You slept there all night?"

I asked, my anger fading.

"Yeah."

He grunted, not looking at me.

"You didn't need to do that; I told him truthfully.

"I know.’ He stated.

I was taken back, I stared at Axel with my eyebrows furrowed.

No matter how hard I tried I couldn't figure him out.

It was moments like this where I think there is more to Axel, I think maybe he can't be all bad.

"You kept screaming in your sleep, I couldn't leave you like that."

He spoke, finally looking at me.

I looked down at my socks embarrassed, I knew my nightmares were coming back but I didn't know they were that bad.

In totally honestly, I don't remember anything that happened past standing in the hallway with Axel.

I faintly remember Axel calling Rylan upstairs and them two bickering at each other but I don't remember going to bed or even what nightmare I had.

"And I figured you wouldn't be comfortable with me sleeping with you so I slept here."

He stated, getting standing up.

Well, he was right about one thing, I definitely wouldn't have been okay with that.

"Thank you."

I looked up at him.

We both stood there staring at each other for a good twenty seconds before I forced myself to look away from him.

Axel's eyes always had a way to make me feel lost looking into therm, they were so intense and alluring.

I could feel my face go pale when I watch Axel pick up his blankets and my journal fell from the tangle of covers.

I instantly searched the bookcase and sure enough, my journal was missing.

"How much of this did you read!"

I seethed, grabbing the book off the floor.

My body started shaking violently, I wasn't sure if I should feel scared or angry.

"Enough."

His eyes narrowed at me.

"Then you read the first page where it says DO NOT READ!"

I hissed, quickly deciding to go with anger.

Axel didn't say anything he just watched me.

"Are you trying to make me hate you!"

I asked, feeling heat run up my neck.

"God, what is your problem? What kind of mind games are you trying to play?"

I shouted, my stomach twisting.

"You know what? Here!"

I threw my journal at him.

"Mia."

Axel's voice was low.

means don't let me stop

I barked at him.

feel like

"Go ahead, read it!"

My voice cracked.

oldest son would drag me outside and tie me to the big spruce tree in the backyard like a dog with the chain so tight around my neck I could

down my cheek

was thirteen and a man chased me with a broken beer bottle out of

I hiccup uncontrollably.

I got a cool scar

off my 3 inched

Axel growled at

"WHAT?"

I growled back.

you possibly

My voice shook.

to my knees and bawl my eyes out but I couldn't let him

wouldn't let him have the

sorry.’ He whispered

sob to break my defenses and penetrate my

slid my back against the wall, bring

stop the tears that were coming down

with my

I shouted.

sorry! You never learned how to

I cried out.

out of my throat and no matter how hard I tried to stop

stop,’ I begged my

"DON'T TOUCH ME!"

when I felt Axel place a hand gently on

hand, looking like a deer

breathing, my lungs were squirming from the lack of oxygen

head harder as I started to see black spots, I

me how I can help you,

desperation clear in his

"Leave."

or I think I was looking at Axel, I was seeing two

"No."

gave me a look at if I was

"Leave me alone Axel!"

I yelled at him.

"No."

His voice was strong.

scream, yell, cry, hell you can even kick and punch me but I'm not leaving

His voice turning softer.

"Why do you care?"

I snapped at him.

"I don't know!"

He snapped back.

Axel's face trying to

said stop messing

I hollered.

wish I was messing

He shouted.

want

I asked, mentally exhausted.

"To protect you."

watching me

"From what exactly?"

I met his eyes.

everything.’ His eyes

those people in your journal, from

didn't know better, I would have been certain that

spinning, I didn't know what to

Angel, there are things I can't

He sighed deeply.

me, for

vulnerability written all over

easy, I'm used to it, I've been doing

how am I suppose to

asked, practically pleading for him to understand with

suppose to look at myself in the mirror after knowing what those people did to me? How I let all those people take

do whatever you

snapped to

"Anything?"I asked.

"Anything."He agreed.

while and then

you read my life history I want to know yours; I

immediately, his brown eyes going stone

"Then get out."

feeling desperation creep

"I can't!"

his hands

"Why the hell not!"

surging through my

wormed your annoying self

He yelled at me.

have this infuriating need to make

his teeth, narrowing his cold eyes

my turn to narrow

tell when they were

when I'm

hands balled into