The Silent Alpha

Chapter 20: First steps 

 ***Jane*** 

Agnes and I spend the morning with Kota, Rosalie, Rosalie’s baby Emile, and Evan, fighting our own anxiety from our lack of activity.

In all my life, I had never had a moment to rest, to just sit and watch a movie or play games without a care in the world.

Even if there was chance that I completed my chores, my mind and self-hatred would torture me relentlessly.

As a pup, my father put me through rigorous schooling and speech therapies to make me the best Alpha I could be.

Of course, I could never live up to his expectations.

He would make me stand before him once a week to recite the history of our pack or the laws that governed it and the kingdom.

If I faltered in my pronunciation, I would be struck with a whip.

There was never a day that I made it out of a recital without shedding blood.

My mother would weep sorrowfully, begging my father helplessly to have mercy.

She would sometimes be beaten herself for attempting to shield me.

It hurt my soul to fail her so miserably but no matter how hard I concentrated, my tongue would only grow stiffer, and my words would slur like a drunk.

After I was demoted to Omega status, I became a field hand, carrying weapons for the warriors in training or helping maintain the equipment in the hot sun or cold winters.

As I grew older, I learned many things to make myself useful such as plumbing, mechanics, painting and other basic maintenance jobs.

Agnes is no different.

With her hearing gone, she had to make herself useful to earn her meals.

No one wants an extra mouth to feed.

She was beaten relentlessly by other Omegas if she slipped up.

She learned to be quick in the kitchen, never resting for fear she would be cast out or killed by the Omegas.

So, as we sit comfortably on the couch watching Aladdin with Kota, Agnes and I find it hard to rest, wondering if at any moment, this pack’s kindness would run out.

Even Grayson could not find the words to soothe my racing thoughts.

Feeling myself about to break, I get up quietly and search for a pen and paper before approaching Rosalie with a note.

"Are you sure there is nothing we can do to be of service 2" Rosalie reads aloud before raising an eyebrow at me.

"Are you bored?" She asks nervously.

"W-we can go to the park if you like.Kota could stretch his legs and play with some other pups.Let me just get the stroller for Emile," she says as Evan gets up from his spot to find said stroller.I shake my head at her, writing out my response.

"We just don't want to be a burden."She stares at the note before smiling up at me.

"You are our guests, not a burden," She chuckles.

"Gwen asked for this favor and need," She smiles.

"Just relax and enjoy yourselves. Take this a small vacation while Gwen finishes up her work."

Just then we hear the door open, and Natalia appears on her own, a thoughtful look in her eyes.

"You're back!" Rosalie chirps.

"How was the walk? Did you see all of River Moon?" She asks with a cheerful smile.

Talia smiles sheepishly, her eyes staring at her hands.

"It was ...eye opening..." she replies quietly.

"Aurora just had an emergency to deal with."

There's a serious tone in her voice and Rosalie appears to understand the true meaning behind her words.

"Well, you've come just in time.I think Kota might enjoy some time at the park,"

She gestures to Kota watching the movie on the floor with Rio lying lazily next to him.

"Yeah, mommy!" Kota cries, scrambling to his feet.

"Can we go to the park?"

before giving her consent,

for Rosalie's pup, some

and explaining their purpose to us

watching Kota like a hawk whenever he runs ahead of us with

I help Evan set up a picnic for the girls, spreading out a blanket with snacks and pillows for them

Rio through the open field to the playground, several pups gathering around

with ease, and they begin a game of sorts where they run after each

I could help comfort in some

She is already frightened.

need to

picking flowers, thin

into crowns, her nimble

watches with awe over her shoulder, praising

Rosalie, placing it

a smile as she puts her now sleeping pup away in

the ‘thank you’

yet another flower crown and places it on

gesture, having been so focused

Agnes "Sorry,"

signs with a trembling hand,

few moments before taking the flower crown and squeezing

is all," Talia apologizes, turning to me to

smiles nervously and apologizes once again for

before asking a question I had been asking myself since I first met

bluntly, placing her chin in

you attacked?" Talia shifts uncomfortably on her pillow and shakes her

with a forced smile, adjusting her

"How old is he?"

a tight line, as if holding

four months

smiles proudly before her face grows

us about

here so you can stop looking at us like we're going to

you already if

remains silent and watches Kota

park for lunch and a few hours thereafter until Kota and Rio tire themselves out and

see the hurt in her eyes at being

I can urge Kota to go to his mother, Talia shakes her head at me to stop and walks on ahead of us to the guest house can feel a small pain in my heart as we make the small trek in silence and try to think of something

Maybe hold her hand...

Grayson suggests.

I walk alongside her, Kota

I have, I touch her hand, Talia flinching away

I mentally prepare for her to

suddenly takes my hand, interlocking

my arm, but I can still feel her

her lower lip as a small whimper escapes her throat and she squeezes my

holds onto me for a

can't.I'm sorry," She explains, holding

she groans, wiping a few

and holds

She whispers,

to the room," She instructs as she walks

wash him in her place.Talia looks like she might burst into tears after being rejected by her son for the second time today but nonetheless, appeases

She asks, her

pain in my heart returns as she looks at me with

I know he is truly unaware of

there too long," she

help you clean up if he makes a mess.He needs to learn

down the hall, leaving me alone with the cheeky pup grinning

climbs into the bubble filled tub, grabbing a handful of bubbles and throwing them up in

that he can enjoy the

me many times, but I grab his two little hands and place them

m-no-more, Kota,"

in the tub, the water slowly draining down the hole much to Kota’s dismay glance at the door and

alone, I dress the little boy

I whisper to him, sliding his socks over his

on his thumb, his blue and

is mommy sad?" He asks, a

s-she miss-misses home," I

"Oh," he sighs.

it here." I hide my smile and finish putting on

like i-it

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