The Silent Alpha

Chapter 20: First steps 

 ***Jane*** 

Agnes and I spend the morning with Kota, Rosalie, Rosalie’s baby Emile, and Evan, fighting our own anxiety from our lack of activity.

In all my life, I had never had a moment to rest, to just sit and watch a movie or play games without a care in the world.

Even if there was chance that I completed my chores, my mind and self-hatred would torture me relentlessly.

As a pup, my father put me through rigorous schooling and speech therapies to make me the best Alpha I could be.

Of course, I could never live up to his expectations.

He would make me stand before him once a week to recite the history of our pack or the laws that governed it and the kingdom.

If I faltered in my pronunciation, I would be struck with a whip.

There was never a day that I made it out of a recital without shedding blood.

My mother would weep sorrowfully, begging my father helplessly to have mercy.

She would sometimes be beaten herself for attempting to shield me.

It hurt my soul to fail her so miserably but no matter how hard I concentrated, my tongue would only grow stiffer, and my words would slur like a drunk.

After I was demoted to Omega status, I became a field hand, carrying weapons for the warriors in training or helping maintain the equipment in the hot sun or cold winters.

As I grew older, I learned many things to make myself useful such as plumbing, mechanics, painting and other basic maintenance jobs.

Agnes is no different.

With her hearing gone, she had to make herself useful to earn her meals.

No one wants an extra mouth to feed.

She was beaten relentlessly by other Omegas if she slipped up.

She learned to be quick in the kitchen, never resting for fear she would be cast out or killed by the Omegas.

So, as we sit comfortably on the couch watching Aladdin with Kota, Agnes and I find it hard to rest, wondering if at any moment, this pack’s kindness would run out.

Even Grayson could not find the words to soothe my racing thoughts.

Feeling myself about to break, I get up quietly and search for a pen and paper before approaching Rosalie with a note.

"Are you sure there is nothing we can do to be of service 2" Rosalie reads aloud before raising an eyebrow at me.

"Are you bored?" She asks nervously.

"W-we can go to the park if you like.Kota could stretch his legs and play with some other pups.Let me just get the stroller for Emile," she says as Evan gets up from his spot to find said stroller.I shake my head at her, writing out my response.

"We just don't want to be a burden."She stares at the note before smiling up at me.

"You are our guests, not a burden," She chuckles.

"Gwen asked for this favor and need," She smiles.

"Just relax and enjoy yourselves. Take this a small vacation while Gwen finishes up her work."

Just then we hear the door open, and Natalia appears on her own, a thoughtful look in her eyes.

"You're back!" Rosalie chirps.

"How was the walk? Did you see all of River Moon?" She asks with a cheerful smile.

Talia smiles sheepishly, her eyes staring at her hands.

"It was ...eye opening..." she replies quietly.

"Aurora just had an emergency to deal with."

There's a serious tone in her voice and Rosalie appears to understand the true meaning behind her words.

"Well, you've come just in time.I think Kota might enjoy some time at the park,"

She gestures to Kota watching the movie on the floor with Rio lying lazily next to him.

"Yeah, mommy!" Kota cries, scrambling to his feet.

"Can we go to the park?"

anxiously at Rosalie and I before giving her consent, Kota bouncing with

Rosalie's pup, some blankets, and

their purpose to us to keep the

a hawk whenever he runs ahead

set up a picnic for the girls, spreading out a blanket with

field to the playground, several pups gathering

sorts where they run after each other and freeze in place if

with all my heart that I could help comfort in some way, but I know

She is already frightened.

not need to scare

the perimeter of the park, picking flowers, thin sticks, and long

weaving them into crowns, her nimble fingers delicately folding the

awe over her shoulder,

the crown to Rosalie, placing

as she puts her now

says, remembering the ‘thank

crown and places it on Talia's

at the gesture, having been so focused on her pup and not noticing Agnes getting near

Agnes "Sorry,"

signs with a trembling hand, stepping

few moments before taking the flower

me, is all," Talia

apologizes

with intrigue before asking a question I had been asking myself

placing her chin in her hand

shifts uncomfortably on

have a lovely pup..." she says with a forced smile,

"How old is he?"

in a tight line, as if holding her

four months old…

proudly before her face grows

hard time talking to us about her story," she

safe here so you can stop looking at us like

have hurt you already if we

watches Kota play with the other

being.We remain at the park for lunch and a few hours thereafter until Kota and Rio tire themselves out and lifting his arms up for me

but I can see the hurt in her eyes at being pushed

on ahead of us to the guest house can feel

Maybe hold her hand...

Grayson suggests.

pace until I walk alongside her, Kota mumbling

of courage I have, I touch her hand,

for her to snap at me but instead, she just stares at my

my mouth to apologize when she suddenly takes my

sparks tingle up my arm, but I can still

her lower lip as a small whimper escapes her throat

for a little while longer before letting

She explains, holding her hand

groans, wiping a few stray

hardens her face and holds

She whispers,

Kota to the room," She instructs as she walks

let me wash him in her place.Talia looks

it?" She asks,

in my heart returns as she looks at me with glossy

mother's heart, but I know he is truly unaware of how much his simple request is hurting her.I accept

him stay in there too long," she

you clean up if he makes a mess.He needs to learn that there are consequences

me alone with

undresses and climbs into the bubble filled tub, grabbing a handful

to wash him so that he can enjoy the bubbles before the

tries to splash me many times, but I grab his two little hands and place them over

m-no-more, Kota," I say

draining down the hole much to Kota’s dismay glance at the door and listen for any

alone, I dress the little boy in

I- t-think yo-your mommy is s-sad," I whisper to him, sliding his socks

blue and brown eyes blinking

is mommy sad?" He asks, a patient look

thi-thi-think s-she miss-misses

"Oh," he sighs.

my smile and

like i-it t-t-too,"

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