The Silent Alpha

Chapter 20: First steps 

 ***Jane*** 

Agnes and I spend the morning with Kota, Rosalie, Rosalie’s baby Emile, and Evan, fighting our own anxiety from our lack of activity.

In all my life, I had never had a moment to rest, to just sit and watch a movie or play games without a care in the world.

Even if there was chance that I completed my chores, my mind and self-hatred would torture me relentlessly.

As a pup, my father put me through rigorous schooling and speech therapies to make me the best Alpha I could be.

Of course, I could never live up to his expectations.

He would make me stand before him once a week to recite the history of our pack or the laws that governed it and the kingdom.

If I faltered in my pronunciation, I would be struck with a whip.

There was never a day that I made it out of a recital without shedding blood.

My mother would weep sorrowfully, begging my father helplessly to have mercy.

She would sometimes be beaten herself for attempting to shield me.

It hurt my soul to fail her so miserably but no matter how hard I concentrated, my tongue would only grow stiffer, and my words would slur like a drunk.

After I was demoted to Omega status, I became a field hand, carrying weapons for the warriors in training or helping maintain the equipment in the hot sun or cold winters.

As I grew older, I learned many things to make myself useful such as plumbing, mechanics, painting and other basic maintenance jobs.

Agnes is no different.

With her hearing gone, she had to make herself useful to earn her meals.

No one wants an extra mouth to feed.

She was beaten relentlessly by other Omegas if she slipped up.

She learned to be quick in the kitchen, never resting for fear she would be cast out or killed by the Omegas.

So, as we sit comfortably on the couch watching Aladdin with Kota, Agnes and I find it hard to rest, wondering if at any moment, this pack’s kindness would run out.

Even Grayson could not find the words to soothe my racing thoughts.

Feeling myself about to break, I get up quietly and search for a pen and paper before approaching Rosalie with a note.

"Are you sure there is nothing we can do to be of service 2" Rosalie reads aloud before raising an eyebrow at me.

"Are you bored?" She asks nervously.

"W-we can go to the park if you like.Kota could stretch his legs and play with some other pups.Let me just get the stroller for Emile," she says as Evan gets up from his spot to find said stroller.I shake my head at her, writing out my response.

"We just don't want to be a burden."She stares at the note before smiling up at me.

"You are our guests, not a burden," She chuckles.

"Gwen asked for this favor and need," She smiles.

"Just relax and enjoy yourselves. Take this a small vacation while Gwen finishes up her work."

Just then we hear the door open, and Natalia appears on her own, a thoughtful look in her eyes.

"You're back!" Rosalie chirps.

"How was the walk? Did you see all of River Moon?" She asks with a cheerful smile.

Talia smiles sheepishly, her eyes staring at her hands.

"It was ...eye opening..." she replies quietly.

"Aurora just had an emergency to deal with."

There's a serious tone in her voice and Rosalie appears to understand the true meaning behind her words.

"Well, you've come just in time.I think Kota might enjoy some time at the park,"

She gestures to Kota watching the movie on the floor with Rio lying lazily next to him.

"Yeah, mommy!" Kota cries, scrambling to his feet.

"Can we go to the park?"

at Rosalie and I before giving her consent, Kota bouncing with excitement while Rio jumps

for Rosalie's pup, some blankets, and Rio’s

different buildings and explaining their purpose to us to keep the walk from

he runs ahead of

arrive at the park, I help Evan set up a picnic for the girls, spreading out a blanket

the open field to the playground, several pups gathering around him

sorts where they run after each other and freeze

that I could help comfort in some way, but I know better

She is already frightened.

not need to

walks around the perimeter of the park, picking flowers, thin sticks, and long blades

large pile of foliage and begins weaving them into crowns, her nimble fingers delicately folding the flower stems and

awe over her

Rosalie, placing it on

this for me?" Rosalie asks with a smile as she puts her now sleeping pup away

she says, remembering the ‘thank you’ sign from

yet another flower crown and

having been so focused on her pup and not

Agnes "Sorry,"

with a

for a few moments before taking the flower crown and squeezing

is all," Talia apologizes, turning

and apologizes once again

a question I had been asking myself

She asks bluntly, placing her chin in

Talia shifts uncomfortably on

says with

"How old is he?"

a tight line, as

four months old…

proudly before

hard time talking to us about her

FYI, you are safe here so you can stop looking at us like we're

would have hurt you already if we wanted

and watches Kota play with the other

but decides to keep them to herself for the time being.We remain at the park for lunch and a few hours thereafter until Kota and Rio tire themselves

I can see the hurt in

of us to the guest house can feel a small pain in my heart as we make the small trek in silence and try

Maybe hold her hand...

Grayson suggests.

my pace until I walk alongside her, Kota mumbling

drop of courage I have, I touch her hand, Talia flinching away at

prepare for her to snap at me but instead, she just stares at my

she suddenly takes my hand, interlocking

up my arm, but I can still feel her

bites down on her lower lip as a small whimper escapes her throat and she squeezes my

a little while longer before letting

sorry," She explains, holding her hand as if

groans, wiping a few

and holds her head

She whispers, avoiding

the room," She

At the house, Talia prepares a warm bath for Kota, but he begs her to let me wash him in her place.Talia looks like she might burst into tears after being rejected by her son for the second time today but

She asks,

as she

boy for breaking his mother's heart, but I know he is truly unaware of how much his simple request is hurting

in there too long," she

and have him help you clean up if he makes a mess.He needs

me alone with the

and climbs into the bubble filled tub, grabbing a handful of

wash him so that he can enjoy the bubbles before the water

I grab his two little hands and

Kota," I

draining down the hole much to

we are alone, I dress the little boy in a pair of blue

whisper to him, sliding his socks

sucks on his thumb, his blue

is mommy sad?" He asks, a

miss-misses

"Oh," he sighs.

I hide my

like i-it

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